Compulsive Gambler in Recovery
It is better to build character than to be one.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
New Running Shoes
My dinner plans yesterday evening were cancelled so that left me with the choice of going to workout or being lazy. I chose to workout and got in a fantastic session. While I was doing my core exercises I noticed a person nod at me as they were walking through. I did not immediately recognize this person but after a few seconds I put the face with a name. This was a person I worked with at my previous employer. I did not work directly with this person but we know each and had a work/business relationship.
This wasn’t the person I thought I would have run into at the gym and I suspect I will run into that person sometime soon. Anyhow I nodded back and went on with my workout. I went through my weightlifting routine and made my way over to the exercise cycle. As I was riding the exercise cycle this person came up to me and shook my hand while asking how I was doing. My response was “very well, thank you and everything is working out for the very best”. His response to this was “yes, it always does,” and he gave me a big smile while walking out of the gym.
I too had a smile as they walked out of the gym and one of my fears had been alleviated. As much as I like to play the “live and let live” attitude when situations such as this one arise I can feel my heart rate increasing. I do believe in the “what you think of me is none of my business” but in practice this seems to be something else. What I have done was wrong and will always be wrong. I can’t change that I can only embrace recovery each day which is exactly what I choose. It is great to see everything coming together and I have no doubt this will continue one day at a time.
I had a warm feeling come over me as I was having this very brief conversation and when it was over I cycled with inner warmth. There are people who will never understand and that is okay by me because I accept the fact I have no control over their thought processes. It is amazing that for the most part everyone I have come in contact with is so supportive and my life continues to get better because of recovery. This was an example of how everything is working out for the best and I am eternally grateful.
I completed the workout a very sweaty person (once again). I have noticed my endurance has increased tremendously over the past few weeks and I am indeed ready for the marathon next week. As I prepare for the marathon my new running shoes arrived yesterday. I did get a very good deal on these shoes and they are a pair of New Balance running shoes which I have never owned before. The internet is a powerful tool and after researching for quite some time I settled on these shoes because of reviews by other runners. I have extremely high arches on my feet and I need a certain type of running shoes. This high arch precludes me from wearing certain regular shoes such as loafers and anything that doesn’t secure the foot to the shoe. My running shoes are no exception and usually these running shoes are very expensive but through the research I found this pair.
I couldn’t wait to try out my new running shoes and even though I worked out last night I was up early this morning all ready for my workout. Essentially this amounted to a double session workout because I had less then twelve hours rest between sessions but this did not stop me. The running shoes felt divine and I do believe I had worn out my other running shoes which was causing the problems in my shins. Immediately I could feel the difference between my new running shoes and my old running shoes. These shoes are so much lighter then my other shoes and are so much more responsive. I didn’t have any discomfort in my shins even though my intensity was very high as I ran. In fact this was my highest intensity I have experienced since I started training for the marathon. My feet felt great and my shins were starting to heal. I had a wonderful run and I am looking forward to the marathon.
I made my way into work this morning and my duties are getting less and less with each passing day. There really is only so much I can do under the circumstances so I do my best to keep myself busy. I had a personal task to tend to this morning and I am hoping this personal task leads to good things. I have made so many dear friends in the past three years and one dear friend continues to be my “sensei” in so many matters. This dear friend once again steered me in the proper direction and I am forever in their debt.
I completed this personal task and it was time to go to lunch. Today was a special lunch because two very good people are leaving the facility and we were having a “good-bye” lunch for them. The restaurant of choice was “Olive Garden” and the last time I was in an Olive Garden was in New Jersey prior to my sentence as my wife and I sat down with a very special couple who had experienced what we were about to experience. It was nice walking into a restaurant knowing those things are now in my past.
It is very interesting because I have never been a big fan of Olive Gardens because I do think their food is mediocre. However; today as I walked into the restaurant I noticed how nice a facility it really is. I have never noticed this before and I do believe my mind was closed off. Now in recovery my mind is open and I am seeing things I haven’t seen before which is wonderful. The restaurant was very nice and the lunch was very good. The food is still average but with my palate this really doesn’t matter!!
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