Ah the "Attitude"

It wasn’t a very pleasant conversation with my daughter last night and it really wasn’t a conversation; it was more like a one-sided directive. My daughter has a tendency to be moody. Usually these moods happen in the morning and as the day moves along she progresses into more of a human being. However; last night while we were at our dear friends’ house my daughter displayed some of this moodiness and was reprimanded by one of our friends. It was unusual to see this behavior displayed outside of our house since it is normally relegated to the confines of our home. This is a disturbing event and I was very happy to hear our dear friend say something to our daughter. The display was of disrespect not to our friend but to my wife and I and for this my daughter lost her bicycle privileges for the next two days.

The “attitude” of my daughter continued to this conversation and she was giving this “attitude” to my wife which is not unusual. Over the past two years while I was “away” my wife and daughter have had their run-ins but last night the attitude spilled over to me as well. I won’t stand for this attitude and when I saw the rolling of the eyes I let my daughter have it. I screamed so loud I had to close the windows because I think the people on the other block had heard me. My daughter immediately knew what she did was wrong and started to cry.

Things calmed down over the next few minutes as we had a conversation about this attitude but apparently my daughter was having a hard time controlling her attitude. There was another glimpse of this attitude as we spoke and once again I had to raise my voice to get my point across. According to my daughter she is not “afraid” of her mother because my wife (again according to my daughter) doesn’t follow through on the threats. However; my daughter is afraid of me because of my “voice” (very loud and threatening). My daughter received a full dose of the “voice” last night and I’m not sure if any of this had an effect on her. Yes, she lost the bicycle privileges but the only activity my daughter holds near and dear is playing on the softball team and we broached that subject about her losing that privilege. I certainly hope it doesn’t get that far but if she continues she will lose the softball privilege very soon.

The conversation and ordeal were over as my daughter calmed down. I did my best in telling my daughter all I want is for her to be respectful to both wife and me. I understand there are times that the attitude will come through but hopefully these times will be few and far between. My daughter assured me she wasn’t “perfect” and once I heard that I assured her I am not seeking perfection. There was much more resistance from my daughter than I had expected so I am guessing the road to teenage land will be a rocky one!!! Only time has the answers and I will continue enjoying even these “moments” one at a time.

This morning I had to once again make a long drive for my new position. There was a very big conference for the recovery industry about 2 hours away from where I live. I didn’t have to get up at the wee hours of the morning because it made no sense since the traffic is horrendous in this part of Southern California. I took my time this morning and was out the door before the children departed for school. I made my way to the conference and yes, the traffic was still horrendous but fortunately my attitude is very good when it comes to these types of situations; live and let live along with knowing where I was this time last year. The world is wonderful and traffic jams are wonderful too because I know the alternative. I will trade sitting in a prison with sitting in traffic any day and today was a very good day.

The conference was at a picturesque hotel on the Pacific Ocean and I had to stop and enjoy the view. The hotel overlooked the beach and the ocean which is a very serene setting for a recovery conference. It is my job to get to know anyone interested in recovery and today I got to know some of the players in the industry. It is funny how this industry is not unlike any other industry since it appears most of the people in attendance knew one another from all across the country. This was identical to the industry where I have most of my experience (gaming industry) and those conferences were sort of like mini-reunions much like this conference. I was the outsider but was made to feel at home by my boss who knew just about all of the “players” at the conference. I had a very good time and I do need to work on developing an outgoing personality in these types of events but all was good.