Compulsive Gambler in Recovery
It is better to build character than to be one.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Gamblers Anonymous Very Important
I failed to mention that we took advantage of some “schwag” in the goodie bag that was given out at the marathon. Typically these goodie bags are filled with giveaways and this was certainly the case over the weekend. In the bag were various promotional products along with PowerBars, Cliff Bars and other assorted protein/energy bars. Also there were two free tickets to the Aquarium of the Pacific and since we were in the neighborhood we took advantage of this promotion. We only had to pay for the children and everyone enjoyed the visit to the aquarium.
I got a little confused as to the location of the aquarium so I logged a few more miles after the marathon as we walked around the Long Beach Convention Center searching for the Aquarium. Finally we had to ask someone and yes, we were in the wrong location. We finally got our bearings down and made our way to the aquarium. Everyone had a good time looking at the exotic fish but I was the only interested in the interactive displays touching the sharks and stingrays. My son did “muster” up enough courage to touch the starfish but my daughter would have nothing to do with this. This was a great way to spend the afternoon after the marathon in Long Beach. We capped the day off with dinner at P.F. Changs which was delicious.
This morning I was feeling good enough to make my way to the gym but I got sidetracked giving myself another day off from exercising. I had some impromptu work I needed to tend to and this made the morning pass very quickly. I had to edit an item and I remember editing various reports in my previous career and never realizing how much I enjoy writing. Now I understand the fact that I like writing and I can’t help thinking back to many years ago when I started my career where I had my reports edited which looked like they were bleeding since there was so much red ink on the pages. I did manage to get better over my career and now I would rather write than work on a spreadsheet!!!
This evening was technically a free evening as my son had his baseball practice last night and my daughter didn’t have anything scheduled as well. The baseball practice last night went well but it is interesting how I take a back seat when some of the other coaches are at practice. This is what happened last night and I found myself talking with one of the parents for most of the practice. This was okay by me because my daughter was there helping out as well. She volunteered her services and really wanted to go to her brother’s practice. My daughter is a very interesting “sort” because there are days where she wants nothing to do with her brother and there are days like last night where she wanted to help her brother and his team, go figure; I really can’t!!!
Since we had nothing planned this evening I wanted to fit in a Gamblers Anonymous meeting. I must be honest because this is what recovery is all about and I have to say I really didn’t want to go to the meeting as the time approached. I expressed my lack of enthusiasm to the family and was reprimanded by my son as he insisted I had to go. He is so cute and he did mean what he said. I took his words and did make my way to the meeting. The meeting was very good and probably one of the reasons why the meeting was very good was due to the fact that there were two new members in attendance. One unfortunate soul was so torn up they couldn’t muster any therapy while the other person was just there to placate their spouse.
In my three plus years associated with Gamblers Anonymous I have seen both of these types before and it still saddens me to know how insidious this compulsive gambling addiction really is. These are outstanding remainders for me and it would be crazy if I were to forget where I came from since I have been through so much and I have put my family through so much. However; this disease is relentless and I know I must be cognizant all the time.
I forgot what I felt like that day over 20 years ago when I had to tell my mother and father I had lost over $13,000 to a bookie. I had also forgotten when I had to declare bankruptcy over 15 years ago. I would be hard pressed to forget the past two years but I know where my compulsive addiction can take me which is why I need and want Gamblers Anonymous in my life. I am so happy I decided to go to the meeting tonight because I felt so much better after the meeting than when I entered the room.
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