Compulsive Gambler in Recovery
It is better to build character than to be one.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Prophetic Page 17
Page 17 of the Gamblers Anonymous Combo Book now has 8 entries and the last entry continues to resonate loudly with me. “…..The days and weeks will pass soon enough….” Are such prophetic words because as I reach one year from my release and four years from my abstinent date these days continue to accelerate in warp speed; I remember having a high school teacher talk about how the years go by so much quicker as we age. The example was with simple math stating that one year in the life of a one year old is 100% of that person’s life whereas as one year in the life of a 60 year old is only 1/60th of that person’s life. I am sure I understand the mathematical concept when I first heard this over 25 years ago but never fully understand the personal meaning until recently. Prior to entering recovering I didn’t value time I just bided my time. Of course I had to “do” the time; however; fortunately for me because of recovery instead of doing the time I continue to make the best of that time. This is very important because it gives value and substance to my life and of course I am eternally grateful.
In this vane here it is Wednesday already and these days are flying by. I spent a full day at work yesterday because it was my wife’s turn to take my son to his baseball practice and I am enjoying my new position very much. I am sort of a “jack of all trades” which means I master none of those trades!! In my previous position I did what I was told and this does continue but there are many other aspects of this position that only I must do what I am told I must do what I tell myself. It is so wonderful to have been given a second chance in every facet of my life and once again all thanks to recovery it is my full intention to make the very best of this second chance.
This morning I was back in the gym and yes, it was the day for the high intensity workout. These workouts aren’t as intense in my most recent marathon training session but still very effective. I seem to revel in the high intensity workouts and this goes back to when I first started working out regularly over 20 years ago. When I started working out I would hammer away at the Stairmaster and would be a sweaty mess when I was finished. Over the years I changed from the Stairmaster to the bicycle and then 7 years ago I started running regularly. I am still that same sweaty mess when I finish my workout that I was when I first started and I seem to want the sweaty mess even more as I get older. I have realized over the past few years that I can accomplish more in less time and it isn’t about the duration but about the quality of the workout. This transcends into my life because it is all about quality and lately I need to remind myself as the demands of life accumulate. I am blessed and I must never lose sight of these blessing for fear of making those horrible mistakes of my past.
There weren’t any mistakes this morning as I had my shortest workout of the week but the most intense. I had more sweat in such a short period of time and something interesting is starting to happen as I move forward in my new daily routine. As I wake up I really don’t want to go to the gym but would rather stay in bed but after a few minutes I drag myself out of bed. I get myself dressed and out the door. Even as I warm-up I am not really into exercising but after 10 minutes I get into a rhythm and when I am finished I feel great. This has happened everyday this week and today was no exception. I felt great and had a big smile on my face as I headed to the showers a drippy sweaty mess this morning. I am one fortunate soul and love everything about my life.
As the workout was complete and I cleaned up; I headed off to work for another fun filled day. The three tasks I set for myself continue to be a challenge as the other issues arise but thankfully at the end of the day I do feel like I have accomplished most of the those three things. Today I had to get the official word on whether or not I would be allowed to go to Colorado this weekend. This was just a mere formality but as things go the more things that change the more they stay the same. I didn’t receive a runaround the “formality” took a little longer than I expected; however; much to my surprise everything was completed without a visit to my “favorite” office. Conceivably this would be my last request as my parole ends next month. This wasn’t a problem and my how things have changed over the last year. What I thought would happen has happened it just took a little longer. I heard the horror stories but knew as long as I continue doing the right things I wouldn’t have any problems and this is exactly how it has all transpired. I am now officially allowed to see my family this weekend in Colorado.
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