Full Circle Already

I was once again exposed to the business end of Gamblers Anonymous last evening for the first time since my release from prison. Prior to entering prison I was a very active member of Gamblers Anonymous and attended this meeting on a regular basis. The meeting only commences once a month on the first Tuesday of the month which was yesterday evening. Some say this is a “necessary evil” of Gamblers Anonymous and I can understand this statement. GA is fully self-supporting but it is a large organization and in large organizations there is a need for order. There are some who doubt the sense of “order” at Intergroup (the term for the business meeting of GA) but I have always thought it does give the groups some cohesiveness.

I went representing a meeting who’s Secretary could not make the meeting and the sole reason I was there was for support of a very dear friend. This very dear friend was running for one of the highly responsible elected positions in GA called a “trustee”. This dear friend embodies the GA Program and I was delighted to hear his name announced as one of the three elected trustees. We had every meeting from our area represented all in support of this dear friend.

This was my return to Intergroup and when I last attended my sponsor was the chairperson of this meeting. My sponsor has since moved out of the area and there was a new chairperson. As fate would have it as I entered the room my cell phone rang and it was my sponsor. My sponsor had called for a completely unrelated reason but it was odd hearing his voice but not seeing him at the meeting. Anyhow the new chairperson did a great job of reigning in all of the “personalities” in the room which is a fete in and of itself.

It was wonderful seeing people I hadn’t seen in almost two years and it was great to see nothing had changed. The same people spoke on essentially the same issues that were discussed two years ago. Everyone at the meeting was there on a volunteer basis and no one was being paid for their time but clearly there was a great deal of care in the room. This care goes to the core of the GA Program which is people helping people overcome their gambling addiction and also learning a new positive way of living. I am eternally grateful for this program and it was the least I could do spending the evening at the meeting.

As was the case a couple of years ago we carpooled to the meeting as it is about 40 miles away. These rides are wonderful therapy and are an extension of the GA Program. I brought the idea of holding a “discussion group” once a month and this was met with resounding positive feedback. Everyone was completely in favor of this meeting and we agreed the best night would be the last Friday of the month. Now we need to get the word out to the other groups and see how everyone else feels about this being a possibility. I was very pleased to hear the positive feedback and look forward to getting this meeting implemented.

The day was very long and I got a ride back from my dear friend who met all of us at the meeting. We continued on one of our regular discussions on the ride home and continued when we got home. It was a long day but a wonderful day especially being so closely associated with the GA Program. I stayed awake much later then usual talking with my dear friend and knew I wouldn’t get up in the morning to workout. My body was calling for a morning of rest and it was a good morning to sleep in. I have dinner plans later on this evening and I may workout prior to those dinner plans depending upon how I feel.

I arrived at work earlier then usual since I didn’t workout this morning. My mind was somewhat fixated on a meeting I was going to have lunchtime. This meeting was at the same place where I was sentenced almost two years ago. I hadn’t been back there since and really wasn’t looking forward to walking into that building but it was something I needed to do. I certainly don’t want to be melodramatic about this because really “it is what it is” and my life is so much better now then it has ever been. It really is all about choosing the proper positive attitude. I did my best not to obsess on the meeting and going back to that place so I just focused on my work this morning.

The morning flew by and before I knew it I was departing for the meeting. I met my boss as we rode together to the meeting. Ironically enough he came back from a different meeting with people I was intimately associated with prior to my misdeeds. This was exactly my ex-employer but a division of that employer. At my current position I have been dealing with this division and the people my boss had met with this morning. As soon as I saw my boss he gave me rundown of that meeting. At the meeting according to my boss the two people he met couldn’t say enough good things about me. Of course this was great to hear (for my ego) but really it is just me doing my job to the best of my ability. I do my best to maintain a positive and sincere attitude with everyone and apparently I am well thought of.

This was good news as we drove to the meeting at the place where I was sentenced. Strangely enough I had a sense of calm as we drove toward the ominous building. The last time I pulled into the parking lot I was with my wife knowing that it would be day. Today was completely different because I knew in two hours I would be walking out of the building. I most certainly walked out of the building two hours later and I found myself immersed in the meeting for those two hours. I guess I can say I have come “full circle” but this circle has a positive tangent line and I am headed right down this line!!