Attitude Determiner

Last night, I was behind schedule all night. My writing took me past my usual bedtime. This was okay because when I get started writing, I do get energized. This is much like my running or my exercising. I start off slow and then build. Last night, I procrastinated with my writing which caused the delay. Since the mail call was 30 minutes late, everything I did subsequently was late as well. This didn’t matter much because I found, in the past almost year, it is my attitude that determines how I feel. If I procrastinate and am apprehensive about writing, my mood tends to be not so good; however, once I determine when I need to start get going, my mood picks up. Attitude, especially my own attitude, is indeed everything.

Before going to sleep, I put some anti-itch hydrocortisone on my yet-to-be-determine rash. I swear I was itchier afterwards and was scratching my legs for a good 20 minutes. I got up at my usual time, and much to my surprise, my neighbors were also awake for the second day in a row. This is the first time they have been able to get up two days in a row to go and workout. My friend on the other had intended to get up early this morning but once again had a rough night sleeping due to his cold and cough. He didn’t get much sleep last night and was much too tired this morning. It is now a ritual for me to get up, and each day I go and exercise.

This morning while I was exercising, I noticed a few more inmates running the track in the early morning. I don’t want to come off as being conceited, but I do think this sudden surge in running has something to do with me. This morning another PFT instructor was running the track. I didn’t work with him at Jamestown because he was on the other yard. I did, however, meet him back at Jamestown. He has been here almost three months and had stopped exercising. A few of the other inmates have been teasing him about his weight gain. Also, he kept asking me about my running and warned me about putting on weight. He did notice me running and doing the other exercises because no matter where I am, there is no hiding. I had a feeling it would only be a matter of time before I saw him on the track, and he was there this morning. The key is consistency, which I strive for everyday. Hopefully, he continues the exercise routine and loses those extra pounds.

I had a change in my morning routine because I needed my sheets washed, and after my shower, I took down my sheets from my bed. This may sound simple, but because my sheets are tied to the mattress for maximum security, it does take a bit of time. As I was removing my pillowcase, the pillow where my friend had sewn the extra stuffing became loose. The extra stuffing spilled all over the bed and floor which made a mess. I decided to leave the mess until after I returned from breakfast. I did gather up my sheets and pillowcase to put them in the laundry. At least I would have clean bedding.

With breakfast over, I returned to my room to clean up the stuffing mess. It was easy to clean as I just swept it up. I got ready for work and went outside. Yes, I filled the CamelBack with ice and water. As I made my way over to the sign-out area for work, all of my crew wondered in we were going to be laid-in (day off). Our captain is now on his regular schedule of working four 10-hour shifts from Friday through Monday. This means his regular days off are Tuesday (today), Wednesday, and Thursday. This meant our regular captain would not be here today, tomorrow, and the next day. There are relief captains who fill in for the regular captains, but a few of them are on vacation. My friend was pulling for a lay-in. Actually, my friend pulls for a lay-in on most days, but once he starts working, he really gets into it. I had mixed emotions about a lay-in because, yesterday, I geared my attitude in the best way since I got here. This made yesterday fly bay, and I was hoping for more of the same.

My whole crew was lined up, and oddly, the C/O who checks all the inmates out skipped our line. Also, there was not a fire captain at the front of our line like there was for the other four crews. The prospects of having a lay-in were increasing. The C/O checked all the other crews out and then came to our line. He informed us that we were, indeed, laid in, which meant we had the day off. This has only happened once before a few weeks ago, and that was on a Friday. Being laid in on Friday is not so bad because it makes for a three-day weekend. Now we were laid in on a Tuesday, which does break the week up. After being informed of this, my friend and I returned to our room. He went right to his bed and crawled underneath the covers. This was good for him because he needs the rest. I, on the other hand, do not like to sleep during the day because it messes up my body clock. Instead of sleeping, I picked up “C is for Corpse” by Sue Grafton. I read for most of the morning, only stopping briefly to shave.

This morning, I thought a great deal about attitude and how a positive one goes a long way. I had the whole day in front of me, and I was not going to be one of those inmates who stands around as says, “I’m tired”. A call came of the PA system looking for volunteer workers. I may have a positive attitude, but I am not crazy enough to volunteer for the rock-picking, weed-pulling, and manure-shoveling jobs. In fact, everyone on my crew ignored the call for volunteers. I treated today much like I have treated the past 11 months; it was what I made it. As I mentioned, I read for most of the morning, and while I was checking in at lunch, the C/O surprisingly handed out the mail. I received one piece from a dear friend. I returned back to my room and made my lunch. I also sat outside enjoying the bright, beautiful sunshine.

This afternoon was a perfect time to write some letters. I wrote back to my dear friend. I also composed letters to my wife, daughter, and son thanking them for the lovely Father’s Day cards. I had another letter to write, and soon after finishing, I started to write the blog earlier than usual so I may have another opportunity to sit at the table of normal tonight. No, I didn’t have a day of work, but amazingly, those eight hours passed by faster than the eight hours did yesterday. It truly is all about attitude, and I noticed a fellow inmate who is what is called an “in-camper”. This means he does not go out of camp to fires and grade projects. This inmate is the bathroom porter, and his sole responsibility is to clean the bathroom. I have noticed that this inmate is up early working out even though, conceivably, he has the whole day to do what he wants as long as the bathroom is cleaned. I like the fact he structured his day as if he was going to a 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. job. I, too, would do the same thing. I observed him cleaning the bathroom, which is a thankless job having 72 inmates sharing the same bathroom facility. It only stays clean for an hour at most, but he does all he can do. I really wouldn’t want this job, but if worse came to worse, I would make it work just like this inmate is making it work. It really doesn’t matter what task I do during the day as long as I maintain a positive attitude. There are 24 hours in a day, and my work assignment is only 33% of that time. The other 33% is for sleeping (or there about), and the other 34% is for me. These are the segments of my day. I will maintain a positive attitude all throughout each segment, and I won’t let any segment ruin my day. Today was a day for me, and I don’t know what lies ahead for tomorrow, which is why I enjoyed today. Life continues to move forward, and my life moves forward with a positive attitude.