Family Visit

The regular visit with my family over the weekend was superb and today would kick off a period of 69 straight hours with no interruptions. I have been looking forward to this day for over one year. When I was in Jamestown, I actually had a family visit scheduled. The was meant only for my wife because I didn’t want to subject my children to the austerity of prison. In Jamestown, there are large block walls with razor wire and guards who carry guns. Circumstances did not work out for the family visit in Jamestown because I had to cancel. I never felt quite right about having a family visit up there and it was just as well I had cancelled. Now here at fire camp, the scenario is much different. Gone are the block walls which have been replaced with rolling hillsides and gone are the razor wires which have been replaced by openness. As far as serving time within the California department of Corrections, I reside at the best place with a very good family visit setting.

The visit started at 1:00 pm on Tuesday and concluded at 10:00 am on Friday. After the morning ritual, I went up to the office to see if I could get into the visiting cottage in order to clean it up before the arrival of my family. Once again I was extremely fortunate because the senior CO on duty was the nicest one on staff. She is exceedingly fair and did let me go up to the area to clan it up. Also, I could bring my belongings to the office so she could check them out. There was a musty smell in the cottage but was relatively clean. It was old and the features were dated. I straightened up a little then returned to camp to get my belongings. On my way back to my room, I met up with an extremely helpful inmate who knew I was going on a family visit. He gave me very many helpful hints and I listened intently. He told me to obtain bleach so I could wipe down the floors and he also told me to sterilize the silverware. I wiped down the entire cottage and put the silverware in a large pot of boiling water.

After I placed my belongings in the cottage, it was time to wait for the arrival of my family. My wife knew arrival time was between 1:00 pm and 4:00 pm. Very dear friends of ours were kind enough to give my family a ride. I thought my wife would arrive closer to 1:00 which is why when 1:00 pm came and went without any sign of my family I started to get concerned. I knew they were in good hands but I couldn’t help be concerned especially when 45 minutes went by without their arrival. Since I couldn’t call her, I had to remain patient and positive. As the hour approached 2:00 pm, I noticed our friend’s vehicle approach the camp; they had arrived! I was elated to see them and went to notify the CO of their arrival.

I went across the parking lot where I saw my family and dear friend. I greeted everyone with a big hug including our friend. I am surrounded by good people and this dear friend is certainly one of those people. We transferred the belongings from my friends’ vehicle to the CO’s vehicle. Even though the cottage is only 25 yards away, procedure is to have the vehicle take us to the cottage.

As we brought all the items into the cottage, I thought the CO was going to check all of my family’s belongings, but the only concern was with the suitcase. All of the grocery bags went untouched and my wife had to give her purse to our friend for safe keeping because money is not allowed on camp grounds. Also, my wife voluntarily gave up her cell phone because they are prohibited as well. As the CO was ready to give the okay for my family’s belongings, my daughter pulled out the digital camera and asked, “What about this?” Well, since they are not allowed, the CO had to take the camera. However, before she did, she permitted us to take photos in and around the family visiting center. She even snapped several pictures of all of us.

We were properly checked-in and the CO left us alone. Before leaving, I was instructed that I must check in 4 times a day at 1:30 am, 5:30 am, 4:30 pm, and 9:30 pm – meaning I had to stand by the front door until the CO acknowledges my presence through a wave or by blinking a flashlight. My very worried daughter would remind of the check-in several times a day.

After squaring away the suitcases, I changed from my “oranges” to shorts. Also, my wife brought my good running shoes and it was nice to wear these. After changing, I played around with my children – laughing and giggling. It was magnificent to be with them and it was great to realize these are the same children I left behind last year. The rest of the day was spent eating, laughing, watching television, and playing catch outside in the backyard which had a swing set and plenty of room to throw around a baseball and softball. When I departed last year, it was difficult to play a game of catch with my son because he hadn’t quite mastered the art of catching. Well, one year later, he has mastered this and has a very good arm. As far as my daughter, she is still a bit afraid of the softball because when she puts her glove up, she moves her entire body out of the way. She too has a very good arm and it was great to have a game of catch with my son and her. The mosquitoes were out in full force so my children wanted to go back inside.

The rest of the evening was wonderful and my wife put so much stress on herself to make everything perfect. It didn’t matter to me what kind of food we ate or what kind of toiletries she brought. What mattered to me was that we were spending time together as a family which has been remiss for one year plus. I love my wife dearly, but I have got to do a better job showing it. Sometimes I get so caught up in my children, I tend to neglect my wife which in not fair to her. I need to be more attentive to her needs and this is something I will work on. I want to get better sharing my feelings with her because she is my hero and my love for her is endless.