"Change Your Thoughts - Change Your Life"

As I continue to read “Change Your thoughts…” by Dr Wayne Dyer, I learn so much. In addition to learning very much I get to use his sage advice in practice. Last night after a very good BAKED fish dinner, I picked up my mail. I received two pieces; one from my mother and the other from my dear sponsor. God has truly blessed me with inspirational people in my life and these two are at the top of the list. My dear sponsor writes me without fail each week and I so look forward to the letters. My mom is always sending me something of interest and last night she sent several fascinating articles on subjects ranging from fire evacuation plans to stories of other fellow compulsive gamblers. I am grateful to both of them as I am everyone in my life.

After picking up the letters, I needed to inquire about the potential family visit. My wife has narrowed down her selection of dates to either November 2nd or November 9th. I needed to find out if those dates are available. What I thought would be a simple request turned into an exercise from “Change Your Thoughts…” Before I go any further, please permit to offer a little background. As I have chronicled in the past, my setting up the first family visit with my entire family was lengthy involved process. However, as I moved through that first process everything worked out extremely well and the family visit was fantastic. I was not expecting to have another family visit the rest of my term; however, thanks in part to a very dear friend who donated a free airline ticket to my wife, we could have a family visit with just the two of us.

At the completion of my initial family visit, I had to submit to a urine analysis as everyone who partakes in a family visit must do. However, I just couldn’t go so I was informed to come back in an hour after drinking some fluids. When I returned I was informed that they weren’t ready for me and I would be called later on to submit to the test. Another hour passed and when I returned I was told emphatically that they will call me. Based on this directive, I didn’t return and was never called. At the time I didn’t think anything of it and went about my business. Fast forward to last night, as I inquired about the dates for my potential visit I was informed that it was solely my responsibility to complete the urine analysis and thus I may not be eligible for another family visit. Furthermore, I should have been written up for not completing the test, and I need to follow the rules just like everyone else. Finally, I was told that I shouldn’t think I was better than anyone else. As this whole dialogue was taking place, I summoned what I have learned in the two books and merely stated a few words and was very respectful. I felt the words in my core but did not act on being confrontational. Now the matter will be take up to see if I can receive another family visit or not.

I have always been a calm passive person, but I was very prone to being passive aggressive. Also, I would always second-guess myself. I did my best to avoid this and I have no second-guessing on my part of the dialogue last night. I trust in the Source and know everything will work out the way it is intended just like it did for the first family visit. The interchange last night was a great testing ground for what I have learned about myself over the past 2 ½ years. I was a bit shaken, but I talked with my friends and everyone agreed that I handled my self properly and the situation will be rectified for the very best. Talking about it made me feel so much better and I went for being a bit uptight to laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes. Life is truly a magical process and letting go is the best way for me. In the past, I would replay the interchange over and over again in my mind but now other than retelling this story here, it is over. What is meant to be will be and my belief system is well intact.

After my friends made me laugh, it was time to go back to my room where I laughed again as my new roommate had some very funny things to say. Laughter is indeed the best medicine and I am so glad I can laugh. These are heartfelt soul reaching laughs which cleanse my body and of course it felt wonderful. I spent the remainder of the evening re-reading the letters I received earlier.

I will conclude this passage with an off the wall comment about apples. Over the course of the last 14 months, I have eaten only red delicious and granny smith apples. This ended today as a friend who works in the kitchen ordered fuji apples. I bit into it and was reminded how much flavor an apple could have. It will be hard to return to the red delicious apples. This was a real treat, but due to the expense it is a once in awhile treat. I greatly appreciated the treat and enjoyed every bite of the fuji apple.