Eleven Months

Time flies when you are in recovery. In some ways these past 11 months have felt like 111 years and in other ways they have felt like 11 seconds. What I do know is time ticks on no matter what I do so I better make this time count for something. Eleven months ago today I made my last wager; however; five days later I made the second (first being the decision to ask my wife to marry me) most important decision in my life which was to enter the Gamblers Anonymous Program. I am so very happy to have made this decision (as well as making the decision about my wife) because it has saved my life.

Today was a Gamblers Anonymous day; it started out just like the past Saturday mornings have in these last 11 months with my regular Gamblers Anonymous meeting. It as it always seems to be was a great meeting. After the meeting a fellow member and I drove down to a birthday celebration about 60 miles away. It was a very special birthday celebration because there were four birthdays; one year, three years, nine years and ten years. What made it extra special was these four people were all women.

When Gamblers Anonymous was founded in 1957 most if not all of the members were men. In fact men have been thought of as the one's to gamble through the years and some men (like myself) have gotten into trouble with their gambling. However; somewhere over the past almost 50 years women also started to gamble and some women got into trouble with gambling as well. The only place for most compulsive gamblers to find recovery has been Gamblers Anonymous and it is open to both men and women.

What I find fascinating is the Program was designed by men and not much has changed over these past fifty years but the Program works for both men and women. The Program wants to help ANYONE with the desire to stop gambling no matter their race, creed, color or sex. I found it amazing to go to a place where four women were celebrating some significant milestones in their recovery. The Program does work.

I was thinking as I sat through the wonderful birthday meeting with a great many attendees what separates the people in the Program who really work their recovery to those who seem to struggle by having numerous relapses. I know I can only speak for myself and I can only look at my gambling career. I tried to do stop gambling by myself but never really understood how bad my gambling problem was until my world came crashing down upon me. When my world came crashing down upon me I wanted to know how to get help so I wouldn't repeat my mistakes. What I found is the Gamblers Anonymous Program and I made a commitment to this program almost 11 months ago.

I think the word commitment is essential in my recovery and hopefully will be the key to my success. I am committed to arrest my gambling compulsion and the only effective way for me to do this is through the Gamblers Anonymous Program. I can say I am committed to stop gambling but without the GA Program it is an empty promise because I am only saying this to myself. However; if I get up in front of a bunch of strangers and honestly admit I have a gambling problem and my life has become unmanageable and ASK for help; my life will change and has changed. By the way these strangers have become my dear friends and they are all good people with the same illness (compulsive gamblers).

I am committed to the GA Program no matter what happens through the court system because it is my road to recovery and this road will be with a Divine purpose. Through this commitment will come and has come goodness. I have met people who I would have never met before and I am a better person because of this. I will continue to become a better person as long as I am committed because to me this is the key to my success in my recovery.

Today was an outstanding day which concluded with our dear friends coming over and spending the evening. We for some reason or another since our dear friends moved away from our neighborhood don't seem to spend that much time together but tonight was a very special night. It was a special night because these people are very special people. I thank God for blessing me with their friendship. There are so many good things in my life and I know no matter what happens in the coming weeks things will work out because they already have.