I Love My Family!!!

Yesterday afternoon as I was driving back from the meeting with my Parole Agent my cell phone rang (actually providing full disclosure; my cell phone does not ring it vibrates, I find the ringing of cell phones a bit distracting). I answered and it was my 10 year old daughter calling which always brings a smile to my face. She calls on occasion and in fact I believe she has called me more often then my wife.

Anyhow, my daughter called to ask for help with her homework. She mentioned this and immediately knew it had to be math homework. My wife was helping her but they were stuck on one of the word problems. Since I was driving I told my daughter I would call her back when I got to the office so she could have my full undivided attention. Also; I needed to write the word problem down on paper so I could see it in black and white.

I returned to the office and called my daughter. She recited the word problem and had to get my wife involved as well. The word problem had something to do with how much X was larger then Y. This involved two different forms of measurement such as centimeters, millimeters, meters, cups and gallons. It took me a second to realize what the question was asking but I did grasp the concept. I must say that I have always enjoyed these types of word problems because they are easy to solve since the answer appears in a very logical format.

My daughter is in the fourth grade and some of her math problems seem at a much higher level. It had been a while since I last assisted my daughter with her homework and it felt wonderful. I had been an active parent before I went “away” and I have missed these types of interactions with my children over the past two school years. My wife has done a phenomenal job in this department and I can’t wait to start participating on a regular basis. This interaction with my daughter made my day and I was all smiles from there on out.

Having received the unfortunate news about me not being able to attend her first communion made this interaction that much more special. It is one day of what has turned out to be two years of me missing in action. I can never get this time back but what I can do is make the very best of each day I spend with them and that is my intention. It is not only my intention it is something that will happen. I love my family more then anything and miss them so much.

This brings me to my next situation regarding the fact that in three months time will be the next time I get to see my children. My sisters have offered to pay for the airfares of my children and my mother seemed willing to bring them out for a long weekend. However; after much thought the practicality of this was broached and it is a great deal of money for a limited period of time. I was speaking with a friend yesterday who was so gracious and offered to pay for the airfares of my children as well. He went on to say, “don’t be too proud to ask because you need to see your children.” I hope my pride is not getting in the way because I do want to see my children; however; I owe this friend and so many others. I owe them financially and so much more since everyone has been extraordinarily supportive.

I thanked my friend and he told me to think about it. My initial reaction was to decline because of the money factor. The more I thought about it the more I realized I so want to see my daughter and son even it is for only a few days. I know they will rejoin me come this summer and it does appear I will be able to drive out with them. I want to turn that drive into a summer vacation since the last time we did this I was so concerned with getting to New Jersey I was reluctant to stop anywhere. I continue to learn life is a journey and it is up to me to enjoy that journey. I will enjoy every moment of our drive together this summer and driving x number of miles in a day means absolutely nothing.

I am hoping we can arrange for my children to come out some time in May for that long weekend. I’m not sure if my mother will still be able to come out with them because she has a trip planned for herself in May. I spoke with my wife about this and she is looking at the children’s activity schedules to see which weekend works best.

It would be great if my wife could come as well but as wife said, that maybe too much of a “tease” knowing she still has to return to New Jersey. I believe my wife is getting excited about returning to California and I know my daughter is very excited. I am ecstatic about their return and it would be great to see them somewhere in between now and July. I am a big believer in everything working out for the best and it will.

Changing gears a bit; I have been corresponding with someone who is not exactly a big fan of me. I entered a business deal with this person a few years ago and that business deal has not turned out so well. There is still some unfinished business between the two of us and I was hoping to resolve the situation amicably but this person wants nothing to do with resolving the situation.

Of course it has to do with money which I have realized isn’t the “end all be all”; however; I do need to “feed my family”. It appears we are at an impasse and I’m not sure what my next step will be. Yes, it is solely about money in my view but I believe this other person has taken it the situation extremely personally. I understand the “Serenity Prayer” very well but I am still trying to figure out if I have the “courage” to change the things I can and I am searching for the “wisdom” to know the difference.