Is This The Day?

Last night I had a difficult time sleeping which lately has been a bit unusual. I seemed to be getting used to my surroundings and sleeping (somewhat) through the night. I am usually in bed by 9:00 pm and fall asleep soon there after. My wake up at 3:45 am comes very quickly. Over the past week I was only waking up once a night either due to the television blasting (I have no idea why the television seems to blast around 11:30 pm but it certainly does) or when the inmates are transferred to a main-line prison, they depart around 2:00am and this usually causes some commotion along with noise. I was unable to sleep through the night last night most likely due to the fact that the “trans-pack” list is coming out this afternoon.

Yes, I am anxiously waiting and no matter how much I tell myself there is nothing I can do about this situation, I am still hoping to move on next week. The sooner I move on the better especially for my sanity. Should I expect to be on the list today, no, based on past performances nothing has gone along with the plan starting from my arrest to my transfer here at the reception center? It is truly out of my control and I can do nothing about it, I have to keep repeating this over and over again. It is difficult but whatever is going to happen is going to happen.

I tossed and turned last night for a good part of the evening. I noticed the lights flickered on and off three times last night. The only light which stayed on was the light directly over my bunk. It is no longer a problem for me since I moved to the bottom bunk but I did notice the lights which flickered off last night. There have been thunderstorms in the area which may have been the cause of the slight power failure. Also, last night three inmates were transferred to their next destination and one of them went to Jamestown Fire Camp Training Center. I spoke with him prior to his departure and oddly he arrived here at the reception center two weeks after I did and he only has 14 months to go on his sentence. Also, he didn’t appear too excited to be going. Apparently he was not expecting fire camp and didn’t believe he would make an actual camp. I did write about the physical training part which everyone needs to pass. This is not easy but by the same token it is not that difficult, and many of the overweight out-of-shape inmates do qualify for the fire camp.

I am sure none of this means anything to me. It is yet another example of how someone else controls my destiny and how I cannot make rhyme or reason out of the entire process. If I dwell on it I will go insane which is why I am writing about it and whining (just a little) to maintain my sanity. I am trying to let go, and I will no matter what happens in the next few hours.

This morning in the kitchen was the second stint with the new weekend relief kitchen supervisor. This week unlike last week I was ready for him. I was ready and my standard answer was “yes sir”. He was just as negative as he was last week but I did not let this affect me in the least bit.
The menu today was hard-boiled eggs, (ugh!) beef hash (ugh again!) and farina. The hard-boiled eggs are made in the central kitchen (thank goodness!) which means I have nothing to do with the preparation of the eggs. The only oven items were the beef hash and farina. This was fine and I am training my replacement who by the way is the same race as me. This is how things go in prison, when one race leaves a position they train someone in their own race to take over the position.

It was only the two of us working on the ovens this morning. However, the kitchen supervisor seemed to want to mix one of the items into the six inch pots himself. Thankfully, he mixed the beef hash and left me alone on the farina. After mixing most of the farina the kitchen supervisor came back to where I am in the kitchen and told me the farina is too watery and I need to make it thicker. Last week if anyone remembers (or actually cares?) we ran out of farina because of his system of pre-watering it prior to cooking. I did not do this for fear of running out as we did last week. I mixed the farina the same way I have mixed it each time we have had it over the past six weeks and yes, I agree it was watery but that is the way we can ensure we will have enough.

After the kitchen supervisor came over to me and told me to make it thicker, I said “Yes, sir, no problem” and he went on his way. See I was ready for him this week and there was no way I was going to argue with him and it worked out well. I mixed the remaining pots of farina thicker and put them out on the line. As I put these pots on the line the servers had to water it down because it was now too thick. After they watered it down (without the knowledge of the kitchen supervisor) it had the same consistency as the previous “watered down farina”. As you can see there is no winning with this person and the best way for me to handle it is to say, “Yes sir”. Also, I intend on taking off tomorrow because one day a week with this supervisor is more than enough. Also, I haven’t taken a day off in the past two weeks and I am due.

Today was another “yard day” and unlike last week we were able to get outside. It did rain last night, this morning, and later this afternoon. However, it did stop long enough for us to get outside from noon to 1:20 pm. I did my usual and ran the entire time. My “Bunkie” was kind enough to lend me his prison issued sneakers (or for those of you in the West Coast “tennis shoes”) so I could run in something more than the loafers. Yes, they were my size and fit very well. These sneakers are not exactly like my normal Asics running shoes. In fact, these sneakers are just like the old time Converse canvas sneakers, they are also just like the old time PF Flyers I had when I was a kid. However, they were certainly better than my loafers which were made for “loafing” around and little else.

I was anxious to run in these sneakers and they did feel better but I wasn’t my usual self. I think the inability to get into a running routine has hurt me a little. I did no running last week and did half a running workout on Monday. I did run about 9 miles today but I didn’t feel very good doing it. It was more of a labor then previous runs. My knees feel great but I do have a strange pain in my left chest (no, it is not the heart) and when I make sudden moves such as laying down or twisting, my chest hurts. It is actually more of a discomfort then a pain and it started yesterday.
I thought it may have been heartburn but not ever having had heartburn I had to have this explained to me. After it was explained, it didn’t appear to be heartburn rather something in the chest muscle. It could have to do with the fact that I am gaining weight (surprise, surprise) and how can I actually gain weight by not eating meat and sticking with my regular vegetarian diet. I believe the answer to this is PEANUT BUTTER and the fact that my aerobic conditioning is way off from my normal production. As we were shaving this afternoon my friend the “normal inmate” said to me I have gained muscle size in my arms and chest. No one should get too excited because a slight weight gain for me still puts me at least 15 pounds away from being “normal”. Who knew I could spend three months in prison, not eat any meat, maintain my diet of fruits and vegetables, peanut butter, tuna fish, and I would gain weight, go figure! Maybe by the time of my release I will actually be at a normal weight, I know this will make my wife very happy!

I forgot to mention an incident which happened this morning with the kitchen supervisor. We were down to our last line service and there were six pots of farina leftover. The line service was a little over half way complete so I unplugged the warmer where the pots are stored and wheeled it over to the garbage disposal to dispose of the farina (unfortunately, we seem to waste a great deal of food since there is not a recycle program such as taking the leftover food to a homeless shelter or the Salvation Army). Prior to doing this I took out two full pots to ensure we had enough for the current line service and to feed all 25 of the kitchen workers after the line service was complete. One full pot of farina serves 125 inmates and there was less than 50 in the current line along with the 25 kitchen workers so I had a good reserve. As I was emptying the pots into the garbage disposal, the kitchen supervisor runs behind and says, “Don’t you throw anything out until I say so; we currently have a line all the way to the door.”

I stopped what I was doing and said, “yes sir” and placed the remaining pots aside.
There were so many things I wanted to say and I did say, “We have plenty leftover which was set aside to feed everyone,” but he seemed uninterested in my comment. He wanted me to stop what I was doing which I did. By the way we didn’t touch any of the pots which were leftover and I ended up dumping everything into the garbage disposal. I did take the path of least resistance which worked out fine but I did want to run up to him after all the line services were complete and say, “See we had plenty,” but of course I did not. I certainly won’t miss working in the kitchen on Friday and Saturday when I am transferred.

Everyday at 4:00 pm “dayroom” is recalled so the C/O’s can count all of the inmates inside the dormitory. This means everyone must return to their bunks and sit-up when the C/O passes by. This is the only time we must sit up during count. The only other count is around 9:15 pm and we could be lying down at this time. The reason why all the inmates must sit-up is so the C/O knows everyone is alive. No, that last statement was not a joke, it is true. One time a day the C/O’s must ensure everyone is living; all the other times we can be lying down “dead to the world”. This maybe disturbing but it is true.

After count we are still remanded to our bunks until we are released to the dining hall for dinner. During this time everyone mills about the bunks and most days I go over to the “normal” inmate’s bunk because it is closer to the door that we go out for dinner.
Today, I stayed in my bunk and waited somewhat patiently for the “trans-pack” list. I was hoping it would be like last week where my neighbor wrote out the list in his bunk. It happened again this week; my neighbor had the list and brought it over to his bunk. He did go through the list and checked for my name and unfortunately my name did not appear. Obviously I was disappointed but unlike last week where I watched my neighbor fill out the list, today I offered my help. He accepted my help and I read off the inmates name, CDC number, date of transfer, and destination of transfer.

Again there were quite a few names on the list, twenty-six going to all different prisons and Community Correction Facilities across California. The southern most prison was Chuckwalla and the northern most prison was Pelican Bay. If you are interested do a google search on these prisons and see for yourself how far apart they are, it has to be at least 700 miles apart. This is like driving from New York City to Boston and back and back again to New York City. It truly is a long way to go.

I was happy to help my neighbor prepare the list and this also gave me the time to see how the list is complete. The list is computer generated and it contains the names of all the inmates here at the reception center who will be transferred in the next week. The report listed approximately 300 names to all different prisons in the California Department of Corrections. Although my name did not appear on this week’s reports, one of these weeks it will. An interesting sidelight - one inmate who arrived at the reception center on the same day (August 11th) I did, got transferred from the same dormitories as I have at the same time is on this week’s trans-pack list. He is going to the Fire Camp Training Center in Jamestown. Incidentally, because the two of us arrived on the same day our CDC (California Department of Corrections) identification numbers are only 5 numbers apart. His number came before mine. I am not sure if this has any bearing on anything but I can take a guess and believe I should be on the list to Jamestown next week or I could be completely wrong. By the way, this inmate has the same sentence as I have; four years with half-time. Are these all coincidences, possibly?