Prison Program

Believe it or not nothing eventful happened in the kitchen today, but I still have something to write about. I have reported this before but I need to reiterate how the cleaning is almost like meditation. It helps to block out the many distractions. Some of these include how these older men act – over the age of 35. This may come across as condescending or mean, but these inmates act much younger than their age. There is the inmate - who no matter what – opens things such as the food I have covered, the ovens which are in operation, and the hot boxes. Everyday is the same thing. One day he is going to burn his hand because as he opens these hot items, he doesn’t have any gloves on and invariably he will burn himself. It used to bother me but now it just amazes me because everyday is the same. Now I can understand why most cooks are very compassionate over their cooking. I am just heating up the food and I have been taken aback by these actions.

There are other inmates who amaze me as well. Mostly it is in the language they use when speaking to everyone. When I first arrived here I had a difficult time understanding the other inmates. But now I do understand the “dawg”, “homey”, ‘home-girl”, “holmes” vernacular. I still do have a hard time understanding some questions which are asked of me. The other day, I was asked why I want to go to fire camp. At first I hesitated. The inmate repeated the question and I explained that my sentence would be reduced to 35% and I would be doing something all the time. I am not sure if he understood my response because he just seemed to say, “Oh.” For me going to fire camp is a no brainer because of the obvious, but I have to remind myself not everyone in here shares my thoughts.

In fact, not many seem to share my thoughts which is why for the most part I keep them to myself. I did have one inmate come up to me today and tell me he is not going to go back to drugs when he gets out. Incidentally, this inmate gets out tomorrow. He told me he is going to run a little everyday and do healthy things in his life such as go to church on Sunday. He has been running with me on yard days. He ran a few laps while I continued, but to his credit he tried his best. Now he wants to take the running more seriously when he gets out and hopefully he gets addicted to running and stays off drugs.

I was very happy to hear his plan, but I would have been happier if he is going to include some type of support program in his life such as Narcotics Anonymous. I know there are some people (not many) who have kicked this addiction with willpower only and without a support group. For me, I tried this method and failed miserably. I need a 12-step program and the support of the fellowship. The program continues to save my life. I do hope this inmate does take these positive steps and starts to change his life. The last thing I said to him was, “I wish you the best and remember drugs are the reason why you are hear so please don’t go back, so you won’t come back here again.” He agreed, shook my hand, and went on his way. I have no idea if I helped him out, but our little conversation helped me. How good it is to be in recovery with a magnificent program. I wished him well and sincerely hope that he starts living a positive life and never comes back here again.

Sometime ago, I referred to the segments in my day. These are as follows:

Early morning – work in the kitchen
Mid to late morning – return to dormitory to exercise either inside or outside
Early afternoon – shower and some writing
Monday, Wednesday, Friday – shaving
Mid-afternoon – lunch
Late afternoon – dinner
Mid evening – writing and bed

These segments make my day go by so much faster. I had someone come up to me to tell me they liked how I work the program. No, not the GA Program, but the Prison Program. I hadn’t thought about it until this inmate brought it up and it is true I have turned my prison experience into a program!

One essential part is writing which I have been doing more and more of lately. One reason for this is the amount of mail that I have received. Unfortunately, today being Columbus Day there wasn’t any mail. This week there will only be four days of receiving mail. One segment of my program is the mid-afternoon mail call. Even though it usually lasts only five minutes, I look so forward to it each day which is why today has been a letdown. I have been fortunate enough to receive mail each day and some days, it takes me an hour or two to go through the letters. This is especially true when I receive letters from my mom and sponsor.

Right now I am in the early evening segment when I normally write this blog. Tonight I didn’t go to dinner – hot dog night – and it was so nice because the dormitory was silent. This does not happen often, in fact, it really doesn’t happen at all. Even when someone is sleeping, it is not quiet because of all the snoring. It was pleasant sitting in the bunk without any sounds. There is something to be said of quiet environments. Maybe this is why peace and quiet go together so very well.