Simple Piece Of Paper

When I went inside for the afternoon unlock as has been the case for the past 2 months I performed my daily hygiene ritual. This consists of laundering my clothes in the sink and taking a shower. My day is so simplistic and even though each day especially those from Monday to Friday are eerily, similar the time passes quite rapidly. I have now been here at Sierra conservation Center the longest of my three (first stop – County Jail, 2nd stop – Reception Center) stops along this journey. I was at the County Jail for an excruciating 31 days. I was at the Reception Center for 70 days and now including today I have been here 75 days. I have noticed over the past few days that I have been more irritable than ever. It may have something to do with the holidays and it also may have something to do with me being here over 10 weeks. Both of these things I certainly cannot control and I must remind myself to keep up with the positive attitude.

Some days are easier than others to keep up the positive attitude. For the most part my fellow inmates have been very respectful. There are a handful of inmates who seem to rub me the wrong way. I must stop being so judgmental because I have no right. Also, I believe the very close confinement of my living conditions have a bearing on my irritability. Again, I have no control over this and I must accept it because it truly is only temporary. I do work my “program” each and everyday to the best of my ability and my program includes keeping to myself. I do keep to myself and again for the most part everyone is very respectful. However; there are times where I would love to be left completely alone. For instance, many of my fellow dorm mates have to know everyone else’s business and there is no privacy. If I am reading an article which I received from my mother or friend so many of my dorm mates want to know what I am reading. Most times my reply to them is, “This is personal.” They seemed put-off but do walk away. There really is a fine line I walk each day not to piss anyone off. There are times when I cannot help it but I do try to be cordial to everyone. I guess it all falls back to patience which I must be. I have over 18 months remaining to serve on my sentence (this is without fire camp which will shorten my sentence once I arrive there; however, for now I am going with the worst case scenario) and can only be achieved one day at a time which is why I have to maintain my patience level. The mental aspect of this journey certainly has been the toughest part and each day presents it own challenges. I do know as long as I keep with my program I will be fine.

Yesterday afternoon even though there wasn’t any incoming mail due to the passing of President Ford the C/O’s still had mail to pass out. It appeared they were catching up on the holiday mail because I received 9 pieces. The postmarks on these ranged from December 15th to December 22nd. I was a bit overwhelmed with all the mail because each piece was from a different person. In this I received 4 Christmas cards and I continued to be overjoyed by the outpouring of love and support from my family and friends. The blessings keep coming and coming everyday. I do thank everyone for their well wishes.

Dinner last night was at the dining hall and I did receive an extra helping of rice and mixed vegetables. Again I was given American cheese for my protein substitute. I believe the American cheese weighed one pound again. I still have a difficult time believing the prison dietician approves giving the American cheese as an acceptable substitute for protein in a vegetarian diet. Nevertheless, the cheese seems here to stay and this does make my dorm mates very happy because I give it away daily. I do have a watchful eye on the menu now that peanut butter is no longer an option and I will stay back in the dormitory more often. It is not with me making the trip to the dining hall in order to feed my dorm mates. I don’t mind helping them out but I must concern myself with myself first and foremost.

Last night being an evening yard I did go outside with the sole purpose of walking a few miles. I certainly enjoy the evening walks and my “friend” does join me on these walks. Also much to my surprise something happened with the telephone sign-up list which actually made perfect sense. Someone (with a great deal of common sense!) decided to take the telephone list from the night before and apply it to yesterday’s evening yard. This meant I could make the 7:45 pm telephone call. For the first time something positive happened with the telephone list and I was very pleased. I was able to speak with my wife and wish her a Happy New Year. She sounded wonderful and once again the 15 minutes went by like a flash. When the telephone call was over I was able to sign-up for another telephone call on Thursday so I can call my mom. Hopefully, I can only wish, this will set off a positive string of events with the telephone.

The regular C/O who handles my dormitory must be on vacation this week because there is a substitute this week. Things like the mail and the passing out of ducats have been delayed over the past day. Very late (almost 10:00 pm) I received something through the inter-office mail. This is a very simple piece of paper which I have been waiting almost 2 months for. This very simple piece of paper was from my county where I was arrested and it stated I have no outstanding warrants or charges. Initially when I went to Classification on November 1st there appeared to be a paperwork snafu. According to the paperwork it stated I still had a charge which wasn’t cleared. I did look at the paperwork and it was clear that it was a typo. However; the prison officials wanted to ensure this was indeed the case. They sent a request to the county and finally 2 months later the request came back from the county and I was cleared. This was the last hurdle I needed to overcome to get to a fire camp. Sometime next week I should receive my full fire camp clearance along with a gate pass. The gate pass means I can attend fire fighting training and when I receive my family visit with my wife I don’t need to be handcuffed and shackled en route to the family visit. I can just walk over there without any “accessories”. I am no longer considered a “high risk” convict. This simple piece of paper made me extremely happy. I did fall asleep with a smile on my face. With all this stated, I still must continue to keep on top of this until I receive the official notification of my “Full Pack” status. Everything is lined up now and I must make sure all the I’s are dotted and T’s are crossed. I have learned to not take anything for granted but I am cautiously optimistic things will go very well and it is on to fire camp.

I am almost at the 2 month mark in my Instructor position and this means I only have 2 more months to go in order to secure my choice of fire camp. It certainly appears I will be here at least the next 2 months and I would like to maintain my instructor position and be able to select the fire camp. Once my “Full Packet” status is official (hopefully next week) I will speak with the Coach and see if it is possible for me stay until March as an instructor. I do enjoy this position immensely and I would hate to lose it right now. Hopefully, the coach can hang onto me for the next 2 months and once my commitment is fulfilled I can go through the 8 day Firefighting Training program and be at the fire camp located in Southern California by April. This would deduct 5 months from my sentence and instead of being released in July of next year I would be released in February (hopefully in time for my children’s birthdays) of next year which is only 13 months from now.

This morning was much of the same when I woke up. I did watch the morning news and again didn’t see anything on the alleged new prison sentencing guidelines. I did see another prison story which again was very negative. San Quentin Prison in Northern California is under quarantine do to the spread of the Nora Virus (flu like symptoms) to almost 2,500 inmates. I have never heard of this virus but again I consider myself very fortunate because in the past 5 1.2 months I have remained riot and virus free. The power of prayer does work and I thank everyone for those prayers.

For the first time in awhile breakfast did not fill me. All I had were 2 helpings of oatmeal as I gave away the French Toast I didn’t bring any extra peanut butter because I thought I would receive a tube according to the menu, I did not. The oatmeal was very unsatisfying and once again as I was departing the dining hall I received the American cheese sandwich as my vegetarian lunch. I was considering stopping off at the pill call line on the way back to the dormitory, but the line was very long and I didn’t want to wait in it to find out the still didn’t have any protein drinks. I by passed the line and went back to the dormitory. I did discover they were indeed still out of the protein drinks and as it stands now I have received 3 protein drinks in the last 16 days, not that I am counting or anything!

I went back to the dorm in order to wait for the morning yard unlock. I read a few more chapters of “Lifeguard” but had to stop because I did not want to miss the unlock. I waited for over an hour (the unlock comes so fast and I must be readily available when it comes which is why I wait in the television area) near the door for the unlock. I finally gave up and went back to my bunk in order to read. As soon as I went back the unlock came and I raced to the door. I did make it but I wasted an hour and a half waiting. It would have made more sense to sit and read but the television area is very busy and distracting which is why I chose not to read. In spite of having a delay of an hour and a half we still had the PFT Plus class. It felt great to workout and although I don’t like the late starts, it is much better than doing nothing. The Coach was there to speak with the instructors after the class and apparently not much has changed with the PFT class since yesterday. It does appear Friday will be judgment day for the students in the class. Either they will re-test or start another 9 day training class. It will be interesting to see if the students do re-test as to how many of them will actually pass the test. These students have not been doing much training this week because most of them thought they were finished with the class. Unfortunately for them this is not the case and now only time will tell what happens.

I did finally finish “Lifeguard” by James Patterson and this novel was filled with more twists and turns than a usual Patterson novel. The book was excellent and I continued to be amazed at the prolific writing styles of the authors. I am rapidly going through my new book collection but there will be a slow down because I need to write many letters over this weekend which I am always happy to do. My program is working well and is with a heartfelt thanks to my dear family and friends for their tremendous love.