Speaker's Meeting Part II

Yesterday evening was the Monday evening speaker’s meeting for Gamblers Anonymous. This particular meeting was started over two years ago and I remember being at the very first one. At that meeting there were only four other attendees and in the two years this meeting has grown. That first meeting was a very powerful speaker who has over 25 years in the program. This is a good friend who I do my very best to emulate. The second speaker’s meeting I spoke and last night I went for a repeat performance.

A few things have happened in the past two years so I had enough material to fill-in the gap. This meeting is only an hour long and when I get going I can speak for a long time; however; I concentrated on keeping my talk to 30 minutes just like my first speaker’s meeting. I was successful in keeping the talk to 30 minutes and it seemed to be well received. The focus of my talk was indeed recovery and how life gets so much better without gambling.

I received some very good comments at the end of the meeting and many people called me “inspirational”. I’m not sure I am comfortable with that particular term because all I attempt to do is my very best each and every day. I can think of so many other GA members who I would label inspirational and most of these members have over 20 years in the program. I am a baby in terms of being in recovery with only 3 years. It has been a very interesting 3 years but the true test for me is when life goes back to a normal flow. This is why I constantly need GA in my life because the alternative is disastrous.

I have tried to quit gambling on my own and it didn’t work out so well. I have been able to abstain from many different things in my life over the years but I need help arresting my compulsive gambling addiction. The GA Program preaches a one day at a time philosophy and I am so grateful to finally understand this concept because it continues to save my life. I also believe for me it is a one day at a time program for a lifetime.

I thoroughly enjoyed my second round at the speaker’s meeting and the more I think about it this is the type of thing I would like to do. I feel very comfortable in front of a group and if I go back in my history this has always been the case. I feel more comfortable in front of the room then in back of the room. In high school I made one of my best decisions which were to get involved with the plays. My dear friends were directing the plays and it gave me so much confidence in front of a crowd. I also remember my first public speaking class in high school where I excelled like no other subject I had taken before or since.

I need to come up with a way to combine my passion of public speaking with a career. I would like to tell my story to others in hopes of being able to help someone. In June there is a very large conference for Problem Gambling Awareness and Treatment. I have become very good friends with the organizers and some of the presenters.

The deadline for presenting had passed while I was “away”; however; a dear friend of mine had asked me to speak on one of the panels. I was very enthused to appear on the panel but the subject matter isn’t a very good match. The subject matter has to deal with how the casinos address problem gambling in a positive manner. I am not exactly a good match for this matter as I am some what the antithesis of what they are trying to achieve. Today I did ask another friend who is involved with the conference if there are any openings on the recovery panels and he is going to try his best to get me on one of those panels. I am so grateful for all the wonderful people I continue to meet inside and outside the GA Program.

The meeting last night had 13 attendees and they were a fantastic audience for my subject matter. I know I can do much better as I started to wander a bit with my story; however; everyone was so appreciative. These are incredible people and it is an incredible program. It was a fantastic Monday evening and my life continues to get better with each passing day.

This morning it was back to the gym as I wasn’t needed for baby sitting duty this morning. I did have a hard time getting out of bed this morning but I do realize I have plenty of time to workout in the morning and I am not obligated to get to work at a set time. My Mondays and Tuesdays are long days at work since I center this on the GA meetings. I am in the office for at least 11 hours on these days so getting to the office a few minutes later than usual isn’t a big deal.

The ironies in my life continue as I spent most of the afternoon preparing a bid for the public entity I am currently beholden to. If things work out as planned this public entity will become one of our biggest clients and combine this with the conversation I had the other week with my former employer the ironies seem endless!! My former employer also may become an integral part of my new job and all of this is in the purview of recovery. My current employer provides a great service and these entities are in need of this service. It would be great if this all works out and I know it will.