Those Great "Birthday" Celebrations!!

Yesterday evening in preparation for the big GA “birthday” celebration I needed to go to Costco to pick up some things. This was the first time I had gone into Costco since my release and I think I was hit with sensory overload. It is a good thing I don’t have the ability to spend much money because last night I wanted to buy so much which is very different for me. In the past I wouldn’t “just buy things” even though I had the means which may not make sense knowing what I was doing at the time but this is the truth.

Things seem to have changed or maybe the fact that I couldn’t buy these things made me want to buy them. Whatever the case I walked down several aisles and wanted to purchase many of the items. Comparing the prices in Costco to the prices in the local grocery stores well there is no comparison as Costco prices are so much more inexpensive. The only problem I have is right now I am just one person so buying in bulk is problematic from a financial and a storage standpoint. I do see spending most of our money on the necessities at Costco and having the trips to the grocery stores lessened considerably.

I picked up the things I needed and I did add a couple of things that I could afford. Then I picked up the pizzas for the “birthday” celebration and headed back to the office. I set up the room in preparation for the meeting and waited for people to arrive and people most certainly did arrive. My dear friend “packed” them in last night as the meeting usually has 15 attendees; last night we doubled that number and it was a wonderful meeting. Part of the birthday celebration entails roasting the birthday celebrant and my dear friend was indeed roasted from so many members but it was all good natured roasting. There were some very good things said about my dear friend and it was a great evening.

The mixture of old and new members was indeed evident last night at the meeting. One particular new member was having difficulty with just about everything. Most of the meeting was very upbeat but this member did put it all in perspective for me that compulsive gambling is a horrible insidious baffling disease and makes people do insane things. I was happy to hear the things this new member was saying because it reinforces my recovery and my need for GA. There is a clear choice for me between gambling and not gambling. Gambling would bring death for me while not gambling brings life; fairly easy decision!!!!

I was honored to chair the meeting last night and there were so many good things shared. This is a very special program and there are so many very special people in this program and I am forever grateful for all of this. These birthday celebrations are great because it brings all the principles of the program together and I was very happy to be a small part of this celebration.

The celebration/meeting was over and I helped clean up along with taking some of the leftover pizza. (I still have a habit of overbuying food as there was more then enough pizza leftover over for an extra 1 ½ pizzas.) I headed home where my dear friend and I recapped the evening’s celebration. We agreed it was a success and I was happy with the way everything turned out.

I did open my mouth and insert foot as I spoke with my dear friend. It was one of those moments where when I finished saying the words I knew instantly that I shouldn’t have said anything. In the true spirit of not dwelling in the past; even though the past represented 2 seconds ago; I quickly changed the subject but had to apologize to my dear friend this morning. I do have to be mindful of what I say because there is a time and a place for everything but last night was not the time even though it may have been the place.

The wonderful evening was over and I was very tired so I went to sleep earlier then usual. I was still a little weary this morning as I got up to go exercise but I forced myself out of the bed. I forced myself out of bed by getting my feet on the floor and once they were on the floor I went about my early morning routine. I went to the gym and had a very good workout. Today is my only day where I don’t run and I did the cycle this morning. This was a good change of pace and I can feel that I have gotten stronger in terms of aerobic capacity because I did a workout that usually gets me winded but it took me much longer to get winded. I attribute this to my running regimen and I am enjoying myself.

I arrived at work like I usually do and went about my daily business. There wasn’t anything earth-shattering happening as we are in the “calm before the storm” part of the business. It appears things should start happening fairly quickly and I don’t know if those things will be positive or negative. I am hoping for the positive and do know whatever it is; it will be for the very best.

The highlight of my day comes when I speak with my family and today was no exception. I got a full recap of last night’s softball and baseball games from my daughter and son. The teams weren’t very successful but my daughter and son had fun which is all that matters. I can’t wait to go to one of their events because they are getting so much more confident then the last time I watched them. This is really fun and I can sense the excitement in their voices. Of course I spoke with my wife who was kind enough to speak with one of the people I spoke with the other day who are facing what my wife faced two years ago. It sounded like a good conversation and I am sure it helped as the conversation we had with the couple who went through what we were about to go through two years ago. Life is indeed mysterious but I am it is my pleasure to experience this mystery each and everyday.