Disappointment Noted

It has been a wonderful two weeks since I last sat down to write a blog. My Mom came out for a visit and I was able to see my sister and her family along with a very pleasant surprise. Last week my Mom came in from New Jersey and we met her in Disneyland. My younger sister had a scheduled vacation with her family in Disneyland and since it is so close it was a natural to go and see them. It was supposed to be a surprise for our children because we didn’t let them know Grandma was coming but that surprise wasn’t as good as it could have been. There was another surprise that I was not in on. As we were waiting for Grandma to make her entrance into my younger sister’s hotel room in walked my older sister. This was a surprise to me and at first it took a few seconds to register. I was indeed surprised; however; I did ask her if my niece joined her since we were short players for our softball game the following day, yes, it is always about softball!! No, my niece didn’t join her but it was great to see my sisters all in the same room.

It doesn’t happen often that all of us are in the same state let alone the same room. I live in California, my younger sister lives in Colorado and my older sister lives in New Jersey so getting us all together is a major accomplishment. My Mom has stressed the importance of staying close and in spite of our geographical differences we are very close. It was tenuous with my older sister due to all of my “issues”; however; as time has passed my older sister and I get along very nicely. We had a very good conversation as I took my sister back to the airport for her return trip home. I can’t say enough about my younger sister who has been a steadfast supporter from the beginning and I owe her so very much for all the tremendous support.

Everyone had a great time at Disneyland and we did the usual attractions frequenting California Adventure mostly. My son even stepped up and went on Californian Screaming which he passed on during our last visit to Disneyland back in January. (By the way the last time we were in Disneyland my Mom joined us as well!) He still wanted no part of Tower of Terror but based on his progression I surmise he will be joining my daughter and me on this ride during our next visit.

Yes, it was a great trip to Disneyland and it is always great to have my Mom here for a visit. This is her third time this year and fourth time since we all returned to California. Her visit went so quickly and was filled with baseball and softball games. Upon our return we made our way to the respective “diamonds” with my daughter and son both having games during my mother’s visit. My daughter’s game last Saturday was very interesting because we only had 8 players due to injuries, prior commitments and family trips. The girls played hard and my daughter pitched as much as she has ever pitched in her short career. She ran out of gas in the last inning and we were on the short side of the ledger but we returned against the same team the following Monday and were on the winning side of the ledger. This was very cool to see the girls bounce back and no matter what happens during the year end tournament I have had a blast coaching this team.

My son has turned a corner and just like most of his season he is coming into his own. He had some very good hits and is certainly hitting the baseball better than he has all season long. My mom got to witness all the games and the whirlwind of our days. The days consist of going to work and getting the kids to and from their various games and yes, those days fly by and so did my mother’s visit. It was hard to believe I was taking her to the airport for her return trip home. We had a very nice lunch on the way to the airport and my mom is such a special person I am blessed to have her in my life.

I had a few “trying” days at work earlier this week and I had to call on all my recovery powers. I did manage to lose my “cool” during a discussion which is very unlike my demeanor. Normally I just listen and let the “tough” moments blow over but I felt I needed to say something. In retrospect I should have kept my mouth shut and just took it so I will chalk it up to a learning experience. I am very fortunate to be in the position I am and very grateful to the people I work for and with. I need to acquiesce to their wishes no matter how I feel because it is their business and I need to respect their wishes. I have to get down to business and make those people happy because this in turn will make me happy and truth be told I don’t have many (if any!) other options. I do enjoy what I am doing and I do enjoy everyone in the office so I do need to suck it up!!!!

I did have some unfortunate news this past week and it has to do with this insidious addiction of compulsive gambling. I “quasi” sponsor a person in the Gamblers Anonymous Program and this is a person I met several months ago. I received a very strange text and subsequently had a very strange conversation. I just didn’t understand the conversation but it became clear a few hours after the conversation. I received a text and the information in the text made what had happened abundantly clear. This person had gone back out gambling and as our little yellow combo states the results weren’t so good.

I cannot and will not work anyone’s recovery other than my own. I am here and I will listen along with hopefully offer some very sound suggestions but I cannot control another person’s thoughts and actions. I was a bit disappointed but this was a wake-up call to me. No matter how well I think I am doing I need to keep the Gamblers Anonymous Program in my life by attending meetings and keeping in touch with those in the program. If I don’t the results are disastrous and I have no intention of walking those paths every again. However; the only way for me to continue my recovery is to work the program to the best of my ability. I owe everything I have to the Gamblers Anonymous Program because I not only have my life back this is a much better life than it has ever been. Wow; life does work in mysterious ways and I am very fortunate in every aspect of my life.