New Roommate

Breakfast was finished and I had the entire day to myself because all of the crews were laid-in for the day. This was at a perfect time because I hadn’t done any writing in a few days since I was out of camp on the fire. I took the entire day to write. While I was writing, my new roommate became official. Yes, this was my friend and I helped move his belongings from his previous room to my room. It was a very easy move because he was only 3 rooms away. Now he is my roommate. When I arrived here last week I was placed in another room but soon was relocated because I was put in my friend’s crew. I had a different room mate for the past week but he changed rooms a day ago because he was placed on a different crew. The bed was open but a new inmate arrived on Wednesday and he was assigned this bed. My friend and I got together and we decided this was a good time for him to move in with me. Now it officially happened and I am very happy. He has been a great friend throughout the past 7 months and now he is a room mate. I follow his lead here at fire camp because of his past experience and this has worked out very well. I know we talked about not being roommates before arriving here but the more we thought about it the more it made sense. We both respect each other’s privacy and are very respectful to one another. This new arrangement is going to work well and I am excited about my new roommate.

My friend was all moved in and we both had smiles on our faces. We are the “odd couple” and I think we are a mix of Oscar and Felix, but we are certainly opposites. This is why we work so well together. He knows so many things that I don’t know and the reverse is also true. Opposites do attract and I am certainly glad to call my new roommate “friend” for the first and only time along this journey.

After my friend was all moved in, I resumed my writing. He went off somewhere to listen to his music. The great part of fire camp is that the doors are always open and there are very tranquil places to go to. One of which is the pond with a man-made waterfall. The pond is complete with fish and frog. My friend has a thing for frogs and has affectionately named the bullfrog “Herman”. There are some days when he will stand and watch Herman while listening to his music. My friend is very content to be by himself which is good because so am I. My writing and talking to my friend took up most of the day.

After dinner the counselor arrived. She comes every two weeks and she was the person I wanted to talk to regarding my family visit. Strangely she called my name and I went to the window to talk to her. She asked me where I was going to parole to and I told her my family is in New Jersey but I owe restitution. As I said this, she looked at her paperwork again and said, “Oh, you don’t get out until next year so I don’t need to know this now.” Then she tore up the piece of paper. Apparently, she made a mistake and had my release date in July of this year instead of next year. Since I had her attention, I asked her a few questions. I inquired about the family visit and she was the antithesis of the CO I spoke with last night. The counselor was so nice as she accepted all the paperwork my wife had sent. She didn’t require originals and said, “Since you have already been approved in Jamestown, I will bring back that approval when I return in 2 weeks.” It was this simple and I was so relieved. When she comes back in 2 weeks I can select a date 30 days from that date for the family visit. This fits perfectly into when my wife is planning to visit me. I do have a great deal of faith (thanks to GA) and I do know this will eventually workout. I also asked the counselor about the possibility of parole to another state with outstanding restitution. She said that parole cannot be transferred with restitution still owed and she went on to say there was a law passed a few years ago which states this. Okay, I can deal with the answer but I will confirm with another source. At least I have some direction now.

Shortly thereafter the mail call arrived and I had received my first piece of mail addressed to fire camp. The letter arrived 2 days of the postmark date. I was very impressed with the promptness of this. The letter was from the unexpected pen-pal who has turned into an unexpected prospective visitor. Life is a very interesting journey and these past 2 plus years have been “unexpectantly positively interesting”.

The rest of the evening, I watched my roommate iron. He told me he “paid” his way through one of his terms by ironing. My friend set out to iron only his clothes which came back from the laundry but somehow he got roped into doing 3 other inmates and mine as well. Of course, no one rivals my wife with an iron, which is really not her favorite thing to do, but my friend held his own. He insisted on ironing my clothes and who am I to turn him down?

Job Well Done

It appears my maximum sleeping duration is 5 hours even when dead tired and sleeping on the ground. The facilities were spotless, the CO gave me a newspaper to read, breakfast was once again delicious, and we awaited for our Captain to receive our assignment. While we waited, my friend went to play cards, I spoke with a few crew members and the Captain, and read my book under a tree. We were ordered to get up and return to our fire Camp. Our job was done and according to the Captain, it was a job well done!

We boarded the bus where we received another grocery bag for our lunch. My goodness, I can see why guys put on weight when they get to fire camp because there is so much food. I had to get a large plastic bag to put all my food in. All I concentrate on is the fruit, granola bars, and peanuts but there were also packages of Crystal Light along with fruit drinks and Gatorade. I gave most of my food to my friend who in turn gave some of it away to the key inmates on the yard. As my friend says, “Keep the wheels greased.”

The bus departed the base camp and we were heading south on highway 99 for the 8 hour ride. We were about 45 minutes away from the camp when nature came calling (actually nature was calling during the entire ride but there was little I could do except wait until we returned to camp). I knew this had to happen and the contingency plan is a Gatorade bottle at the back of the bus. Well, the bus doesn’t have very good suspension so this was an adventure, but I made it through without any problems. Obviously, I felt a great deal better as we headed back to camp.

We were allowed to bring back all of our food to our lockers. Getting out all of the food was the longest part of unpacking. It was a 48 hour journey and I was paid $50.00 for the effort with 2 extra hours of downloading. This equates to a dollar an hour but it is actually 45 cents an hour since I have 55% taken out for restitution. I am fairly positive this is the hardest I have worked to make $22.50. Based on this, I would have to work 800,000 hours to pay off my restitution which would take 9 straight years utilizing every hour within the year. Wow! That’s a great deal of hiking. Anyhow, at least I can put a little money on the books and start to pay back some of what I owe.

Dinner which was very filling and wonderful was over and it was time to pick up my re-route mail from Jamestown. I had a few letters from my mother and some very dear friends. Also, the documents my wife sent for the family visit arrived yesterday. I put all of these documents together and went to speak with the CO in charge of the family visits. Apparently, I didn’t listen very well because the CO required original documents, not copies, even though she said, “I need copies of the original marriage certificate and birth certificates.” This is the same CO I had a hard time with last week. I don’t know how to talk to her because she comes across without listening to what I was saying. I did all I could do to retain my composure and I let her speak. Long story short – the copies my wife sent overnight air were unacceptable and I am no closer to having my family visit approved. I need original documents which are now in NJ. Please keep in mind my family visit has been already approved back in Jamestown, but now I have to go through process all over again. I retained control as the CO spoke to me and walked away from the window very perplexed and angry. I had telephone time but I had to calm down before calling my wife. I know this is a minor glitch in the road and everything will turn out all right. I will get through this and I will have my family visit.

I calmed down and called my wife. She will be sending out the originals to a friend or directly to me, she wasn’t sure. My wife decided to schedule her trip for July and not wait for the family visit date. This was a great decision because she has to start making plans as it is only 6 weeks away. I would settle for a visit on the weekend if the family visit situation is not resolved by July.

I then went to talk to my friend and we decided to become roommates. He wanted to get away from the front door and my roommate was leaving. We don’t believe this will jeopardize our friendship and we do think it is a good idea. My friend obtained the necessary paperwork and the move should take place tomorrow.

My apologies to my wonderful brother-in-law - Happy Belated Birthday!!!

First Fire

I would say we had about 3 hours of down time until we were awakened. I was already awake and quite frankly did not sleep very well in the sleeping bag under the stars. The sleeping area was filled with other fire crews and I even saw some inmates I knew from Jamestown. I guess there were 15 other crews from various camps throughout the state. Our crew is from the southern most part of the state.

I have heard the “legendary” stories about the food served on fires and it has always been good. Well, these stories are very true. The entire staging area is very impressive complete with a mobile kitchen. It was an actual buffet featuring a variety of hot foods, cold food, and fresh fruit. The food was great and I enjoyed all of it. The best part about this was anything you could fit in your pockets, you could take out with you. My pockets were filled with oranges and bananas.

As we ate breakfast, I listened to the fire Captain briefing us regarding the fire. It has been contained and it burned 400 acres. Even though it had been contained and essentially extinguished there were a few hot spots. The crews were on mop-up duty to ensure the hot spots don’t spread. The briefing mentioned that the terrain was steep so to be very careful. There wasn’t a great deal of urgency in the briefing and the Captains wanted the hot spots extinguished so they could move out. We finished our breakfast and it was time to go to work. There were 8 cases of bottled water and 8 cases of Gatorade being loaded onto the bus along with several bags of ice. The key is to remain hydrated during the day and we certainly seemed to have enough liquids. Also, our sack lunches were delivered which contained all sorts of food. There certainly was no shortage of food!

We boarded the bus and had a very short ride to our entry point. The Captain once again briefed us and she told us we would hike up to the top and work our way down looking for hot spots. We disembarked the bus and grabbed our tools and the Captain led us on a hike to the entry point. The terrain was steep and we followed a dirt road for about 3 miles. As we walked, I could see the remnants of the fire. The landside was blacked out and smelled of fire. I noticed a very sad sight which was a horse that had been burnt and was lying on its side dead. I was witnessing the wrath of a fire for the first time. We continued to walk and the hiking is not exactly easy. Wit 45 pounds on your back, it is certainly challenging. We made our way to the entry point after 45 minutes of hiking. At this point there were several bladder bags which contain 5 gallons of water and attach to your back. These are used to douse hot spots along the way. Each bag weighs about 40 pounds. The Captain summoned three crew members and yes, I was one of them. She had us carry the bags up the very steep terrain. I put the pack on over my backpack and essentially I was carrying about 80% of my body weight on my back. I was the oldest and lightest crew member to carry this pack.

This is where the “fun” started – not really. The entry point was straight up over the rocks at a 75 degree angle. The earlier briefing mentioned steep terrain and they were not joking. I had to go very slow with the additional weight on my back. Safety comes first and it was not a race to the top. My friend was kind enough to relieve me of the bladder bag as he took it after I was about half way up the incline. Prior to this, I witnessed an aerial water drop from a helicopter. The Captain noticed a hot spot which was too big for the bladder bags to extinguish. She radioed the helicopter and sure enough the chopper dropped the water about 20 feet from me. It took the chopper three tries and on the third try, the hot spot was extinguished. I’m not sure how much water is contained in this bucket but when it hit there was a mighty splash and many bubbles were thrown into the air. I have never seen anything like this before and it was quite interesting.

My friend made his way up the incline and had his fill (pun – ha ha) of the water bag so I took it from him the rest of the way. I made it up to the top where the Captain was standing and I couldn’t wait to take it off. Thankfully, she gave us a 40-minute lunch break which we all needed. All around us were hot spots which most would burn themselves out. There were a few we needed to address and we would extinguish them.

We took care of the hot spots after lunch and I used all of the water in the bladder bag much to my delight. We then hiked around looking for other hot spots and the Captain noticed a downed tree which was smoldering and needed to be cut. The chainsaw went to work while we dug a ?burrow? around the perimeter so nothing would roll into the unburned area. The tree was cut into 6 sections and the middle section or core of the tree was smoking. The fire was inside the tree working its way out and now that it was cut the tree would only smolder and not catch fire. This, too, was interesting to witness and apparently as one of the sections was cut, a squirrel was in the wrong place at the wrong time because the chainsaw seemed to cut it into two sections, poor squirrel.

We scouted around for a few hot spots and cut some line around the burn section. We were making our way down the steep slope which was rocky. I looked down and realized one false move and it was all over. Slow and steady would be the safe way to go. We were ahead of schedule and the Captain had us take another break midway through the afternoon. The break was over and we needed to roll up the hose line which was on the steep hillside. I slowly made my way down utilizing the “butterfly” technique to roll the hose around my arms. They were rolled up and we made our descent down the dirt road.

The hike down the road was harder than the walk up the road. The crew was very quiet and the breathing was heavy. I started to sweat after a few feet and the sweat was pouring off me as we walked. I was carrying one of the fire hoses along with my tool and was amazed how hard the hike down was. We seemed to inch our way toward the bus and finally after a 12 hour day we arrived and I was drenched in sweat. Everyone on the crew including the Captain was drenched. My feet were hurting and I could feel the blisters on my heels. Strangely, only my feet hurt and I have to believe it was the boots which are not the most comfortable. If it wasn’t for my feet hurting, I would have felt fine. This was a very interesting day and everyone told me Fire Camp is hard work. This is very true and at one point during the hike down the steep cliff, my friend and I were talking about transferring to the kitchen. It is certainly safer in the kitchen, but we decided to give it a few months.

My first fire deployment was over and it was a very labor intensive day! The hike itself was the toughest part of the day and carrying the extra 40 pounds was a challenge. At 9:00 pm everyone laid down and I was asleep in three minutes. There is something said for hard work and it does make for great sleeping.

Memorial Day 2007

Today was a day off for everyone except for the fire crews who were on fire roll. They had to be ready to “roll” to a fire at any given time. My crew happened to be the number one crew on the list which means we had to be booted and suited for the entire day. A call came in about 11:00 am and everyone hurried to gather their stuff – mainly lunch boxes/ ice chest. By the time everyone was out in the gathering area the alarm was cancelled and there was no fire. I guess I was looking forward to my first fire call.

The rest of the day, I didn’t do much else other than some reading. Since telephone calls are much easier to make here, I made several during the day. I managed to get through to my wife on her cell phone because the main number was blocked. She told me about a family member who did something so generous for my family. I was pleasantly surprised to find this out because it was completely unexpected. I cannot say enough and I am sorry to go on and on but I am such a blessed person. I have so much in my life to be thankful for and first and foremost is my entire family. I have read you cannot pick your family but you can pick your friends. Well, I would never pick another family because my family is beyond incredible and today was another example of this. At least I know as long as I am in camp, I will be able to speak with my wife on a weekly basis and this is a great feeling.

After dinner tonight, I was able to make another telephone call and this time it was to my mother. I spoke with her for 30 minutes which is the longest I have spoken to her in over 10 months. We had a great conversation and she too did something very special for me. My mother has done so many special things over the course of my lifetime and in these past 2 years she has been extra special. I am so grateful for her and all that she continues to do for my family and me. I don’t enjoy asking for favors but my mom was great and she took care of it very quickly. My family has always been wonderful but for so many years I took this for granted. Now I know not to take anything for granted and I continue to be blessed with love and support.

As we were lining up for dinner, an announcement came over the PA system. It was for “Fire crew 2 and 3 to go to the front of the line because in 20 minutes you are leaving on a fire call out of county.” We made our way to the front of the line and I ate the delicious macaroni salad (no mayo) in a hurry because I didn’t want to be the last one ready for the fire call. I packed some quick food and my out of county duffel bag was already packed.

Everyone was ready and we loaded onto the bus. Since this was my first experience, I took everything in. Our crew has 14 inmate/firefighters and the other crew has 15. In addition to the 2 fire Captains who drive the buses, there was another Fire Captain who was designated the Strike Team Leader. He would drive the van by himself. Along with the fire Captains, at least 2 CO’s are required to look after the inmates who drove in another vehicle. Finally, the Lieutenant who runs the camp was driving in a different vehicle. We had a five vehicle caravan for the over 400 mile ride to Tulane County – about 40 miles south of Fresno. Our Captain briefed us on what was going on. She told us we were going to cover another fire camp which was out on a fire. This meant if any other fire calls came through for that camp we would handle them when we got there. Our Captain wasn’t sure how long we would be gone. She told us it would be about an 8 hour ride and we would be making 2 designated rest room stops along the way. Shortly after 5:00 pm we were on our way.

My seat is on the back bench and I sat directly underneath the radio speaker. This is controlled by the Swamper – crew captain for the inmates – who sits in the forward cab with the Fire Captain. The volume on the radio is at a much higher level than I would play it myself. It is next to impossible for me to have a conversation without having to say “What?” at least 3 times. Thankfully, sometime during the journey, my friend had the Swamper turn down the volume to a less deafening level.

As I was taking everything in, my friend glanced over to me and asked why I looked so serious. I guess I have a habit of putting on my “serious face” in situations like these. This is not something I do consciously and I was happy he pointed it out. I have to learn to relax and go with it. One of the reasons for my serious face was the fact that a few of my crew members (not my friend) smoke on the bus. Technically, smoking is prohibited but not exactly enforced. I have never enjoyed the smell of smoke nor do I like to be subjected to second-hand smoke. However, this is another by product of my environment and I have to do my best to get through it. Sure it bothers me, but I can’t do a darn thing about it. Fortunately, only half of the crew smokes and the windows on the bus were open but I still get a headache from the smell. I put myself in another place where I was with my family and this helped.

We made the first of our two designated stops at a rest area about 2 hours into the trip. Everyone had to disembark and walk in a single file line to the rest room as the CO led us there. We milled around a bit and went back to the bus. Thankfully, my bladder and kidneys were very cooperative tonight because these are the only 2 stops we make. There is an alternative which includes a Gatorade bottle but I won’t get into that. Back on the bus, the choice of music was very good – 70’s and 80’s rock. The Captain is about my age and I suspect she chose the radio stations. This certainly beats 8 hours of rap or country. I listened to the radio and tried to fall asleep. When I was a kid, I couldn’t sleep in a car. I remember driving to Florida from New Jersey with my family and I would be the only non-driver awake at the wee hours of the morning. However, as I grew older, I recognized the value of sleep on a moving vehicle. My first job out of college was in NYC and I would take the one-hour bus trip everyday. Over the years I got so good at falling asleep, it was scary. I would fall asleep 5 minutes into the bus ride and wake up 5 minutes before we arrived. I called on this training tonight, closed my eyes, and the next thing I knew the bus was slowing down for our second stop. Everyone with the exception of my friend appeared to be asleep.

We got off the bus and repeated what we did at the first stop. The last thing the CO’s want to do is lose an inmate at one of the stops and they have to be very vigilant. They were also very cordial to us and did a great job being responsible for our safety!

Prior to getting back on the bus, our directive had changed. We were going to a Wildland Fire because our crews were needed. We were headed to a fireline and it appeared I would have my first fire experience very soon. We passed several other fire camp buses who were already at the fire. We continued and arrived at the staging area where all the fire crews meet, sleep, eat and receive their orders. This appeared to be some type of outdoor rodeo center near Three Rivers Lake in Tulane County.

It was time to take all of our belongings off the bus because we were going to rest for the next few hours before the sun came up. I grabbed my duffel bag and sleeping bag and walked to an area where we would “bunk down” for the night. Fortunately, it was a grassy area and the ground wasn’t hard. As I laid down, I looked out at the stars and spotted the North Star where I immediately thought of my daughter. I also thought to myself that this could be the first time in my life where I have slept outdoors in a sleeping bag. I have gone camping when I was younger with my family. However, we had a camper and always slept in it. Now I was on the ground, outside in a sleeping bag staring at the sky. Wow, what an interesting journey this continues to be!

Weekends Are Good

I woke up this morning about 6:30 not sure if I would be receiving a visit or not. I did have a feeling that two of my GA friends would be here to see me so I wanted to be presentable and ready for them. I shaved for the second day in a row and after writing three lines my name was called over the PA system because I had a visit.

I hurried out of my room and went to the office to sign-out and walked to the visiting area. I immediately noticed my two dear friends waving to me form one of the picnic tables. I waved back and noticed a great deal of food on the table. My friends came prepared to feed me as well as see me. We greeted each other with big hugs and it was wonderful to see them. These are the same friends who visited me in Jamestown at the end of December and they are very special people and dear friends. We all sat down and sure enough there was enough food to feed me for two weeks! My friend thought I could take the leftovers to my room but unfortunately, I am not allowed to do this. There were bagels, tortilla chips, sunflower seeds, trail mix, tuna fish, and diet soda along with very nice cracked honey wheat bread. My friends know my peculiar eating habits and came around with all my favorites.

Over the next five hours, we talked on a variety of topics and snacked. Normally I am a very structured eater but I wanted everything they brought yesterday. My friend had to drive to several places to find these wonderful bagels. She also made a delicious tuna salad without mayonnaise! I ate two sandwiches, drank three diet root beers, and much more. The atmosphere is so much better than their last visit at Jamestown – gone are the concrete prison walls, barbed wires, guns, and pepper spray. These have been replaced with big beautiful oak trees, canyons, swing sets, and a jungle gym. Everything is as good as it is going to get while incarcerated. I have waited 10 months to get to this point and the wait has been worth it especially on a wonderful day like today. We also talked about their return visit which will include an even more special meal. Once again I must give thanks to the GA Program for bringing these incredible people into my life. Today and yesterday were great days as I talked with my friends and felt their incredible love and support.

The weekends are very good here and now instead of dreading them as I first did when I arrived at Jamestown, I am looking forward to each and every weekend. The fantastic visit unfortunately came to an end and if it lasted any longer I would have probably gained 10 pounds! After we embraced and hugged, they walked off to their car and I had to stay behind while they drove off. My friend called out to me to show me his new car, but I am not allowed to do this. The Sergeant even remarked to them, “He needs to stay here until you drive off unless all of you want to be on the evening news.” This caused a big laugh among us!
I arrived back in camp very full. I was done eating for the day and there was no way I was going to dinner. I spoke with my friend who also had a visit from his mother and girlfriend who live very close to the camp. Even though I am not allowed to talk to other inmates in the visiting area, I was able to meet both of them. The conditions here are perfect for re-building relationships and I cannot wait for my wife and children to arrive. There is a saying in prison which I believe is very appropriate regarding visits – “IT IS ALL VERY GOOD!!” It certainly is all good and both my friend and I had big smiles on our faces after our special visits.

First Visit at Fire Camp and Vegetarian Chili

There are six fire fighting crews and each of them gets a position on the fire roll. This is when a fire occurs and those crews at the top of the roll get to go out on a fire. Only three crews per day are assigned which changes daily based on the availability of the Fire Captain. I was technically off work for the day – Saturdays, Sundays and some holidays are visiting days. While in Jamestown, I received visits three times and each of these was a very special occasion. I didn’t think I would receive any visits, so they were very much appreciated. I do have many great friends within an hours drive of the fire camp and I do believe I will receive more than three visits in the nine months that I am here. I was hoping for a visit today but I still had the uncertainty hanging over my head as to whether or not the approval forms came down.

I went to a different CO who was duty and explained my dilemma to him about the visiting forms not being in my file. He took an extra step by calling the visiting room in Jamestown where they have access to a computer and gave the names of the three people who I thought might be visiting me and they all were approved and verified. I was relieved and all my angst from the conversation with the other CO had disappeared. It is truly amazing how everything continues to workout for the best. Sometimes a little persistence pays off!

I thanked the CO profusely and went back to my room where I waited for the visit. It was getting close to noontime and I thought my visitor would not be coming so I changed into workout clothes and did some running. About 20 minutes into my run, I heard my name announced over the PA system that I had a visitor. Thankfully, I wasn’t too sweaty or dirty. I quickly ran back to my room, freshened up, and changed into my Oranges. These have to be worn for all visits, work, eating, going to the office, and being on the telephone. I walked down to the visiting area where I quickly recognized my friend’s car parked in the lot across from the visiting area. I entered the visiting area and saw my dear friend sitting at a picnic table. We greeted each other with a handshake and a very warm smile. It was great to see my friend and the last time we were together, I was sitting behind a plated glass window dressed in orange and we were communicating via a telephone even though he was three feet away. These conditions were obviously much better as we sat and talked.

I met this very dear friend through the GA Program over 2 years ago and we have hit it off ever since. He has taught me the true meaning of the word friend and it was wonderful to see him. We talked for over an hour and got caught up on so many things. He was hoping to return next Sunday with a few other of our GA friends so we could have a meeting. I thought this was a wonderful idea and we asked the CO how many people can visit at one time. He replied, “ As many that can fit at a picnic table.” It appears 8 people can sit comfortably which means 7 of my GA friends can visit if they are available. I had a GREAT visit and being close enough so my friends can visit was well worth the wait!

At the end of the visit, I walked back to the office where the Lieutenant checked me back in. Unlike Jamestown, where I had to be stripped searched each time I returned from a visit, I did not even receive a cursory pat-down. I am being treated like an adult and I was on a “mental high” from the visit so I changed into my work out clothes to finish my run.

As I was running the cook saw me and said, “Stop running, you are thin enough!” He then went on to yell, “I made vegetarian chili just for you and you better eat a lot of it at dinner!” I was honored and certainly didn’t request this. His final comment to me as I ran past him was “Stick-man.”

My friend and I went into the dining hall and sure enough vegetarian chili was served. In fact, it was delicious – not as good as my wife’s, but still very tasty. Even my friend commented on how excellent it was. Interestingly enough, many of the other inmates seemed to approve of the chili and they had no idea it was made without meat. I guess one person can make a difference without even trying because here I was minding my own business and now the cook is preparing vegetarian items for everyone. This is good!

Wild Land Fire Fighter

This was my first official day as a Wild Land Fire Fighter. We are going to be training which means we are going on a hike and preparing for a wild land fire. My friend helped me carry all of my fire gear over to the bus. I met out Captain who my friend raved about and she did make a very good first impression. She is certainly a people person and appeared not to have a huge ego. We loaded up my things on the bus and I officially met my fire crew. I do live near everyone on the fire crew so these were familiar faces. I took my seat in the back of the bus adjacent to my friend. Seats are assigned by seniority and since my friend was the last to start before me, he and I rode on the bench seat – often called the wino bench – which faces the rear of the bus. This is not a good seat for people with motion sickness and thankfully I don’t have this.

The bus ride was very brief and the Captain explained what we were doing. This was a training session which meant we would carry full gear but not wear the fire protective clothing. I put on my backpack which probably weighed about 70 pounds which is half my body weight. This is something I am going to have to get used to. I have no problem hiking so with the added weight on my back, I will probably turn into a billy goat! I was assigned the third Macleod (tool used for scraping and raking the ground) which was right next to my friend who is the second Macleod. The Captain led us on a hike through very steep rocky terrain. I was near the back of the hook line and again right behind my friend. The hike lasted an hour and the only problem I was having was that the backpack seemed to be digging into my bony shoulders. I had to keep readjusting it, but I was fine with the hike.

A few of my crew members had to take quick breaths as we were hiking. I did my best to encourage my friend and we did make it up to near the top of the mountain in little less than an hour. The Captain then had everyone take a break and catch their breath. I was reluctant to sit down because I didn’t really need the breather. I did take off the backpack which gave my shoulders some relief. Most everyone on the crew was sprawled out on the ground resting. I knelt down for a few minutes but as soon as I saw the Captain get up, I got up.

The Captain went to scout around for a place to cut a fire line. After 10 minutes, she returned and we were hiking again. About 15 minutes later, we found the spot where the Captain wanted the fire line cut. The fire crew is an assembly with the purpose of clearing brush for a fire line which is a line about 4 foot across a path which could go for miles. The key to the fire line is it must be cleared to the mineral soil. This does not burn and would stop a fire from burning. At the front of the fire line are the chain saws which are the first ones to cut the brush. These are followed by the pullers who pull and clear the brush which was cut by the chain saws. Then comes the Pulaskis (axes) which tear up any roots and stubs. After this comes the Macleods which ensures the fire line is clear of debris which could burn. Finally, the last man has a rake which is the final clean-up of the line. When the line is done, it looks like a four foot dirt path cut around the fire.

We cut line for an hour and this was the part I thought I would have problems with. However, with my friend in front of me, basically clearing all the debris, there was little else for me to do. I also listened to my friend who offered helpful tips. I am no longer fearful of working on the fire line and do realize under fire conditions things change and I must be aware of the situation at all times. However, according to our Captain, safety comes first and it is her duty to keep us all-safe.

After we finished a good sized fire line, the Captain was pleased. My friend was very impressed with everyone on the crew. He told me that it was very unusual for everyone on the crew to make the line at the same time. Usually there are a few stragglers coming up after everyone else but our crew stayed together throughout. They were all business clearing the fire line and I was feeling much better about serving on a real fire. The Captain then directed us back down the mountain which took about 45 minutes to get down as opposed to an hour going up. I am not fond of walking down the hill and as I walked, I could feel a significant blister forming on both feet which is nothing unusual nor was it very painful. I took this as a reminder to wear two pair of socks and a reminder as to where I am. I also have two blisters on my ankles but they didn’t stop me and my ankle would have to fall off for me to stop. The Captain drove us to a local fire station where we ate lunch in a park like setting. In fact it was a park adjacent to the fire station. She instructed us to sharpen our tools then to eat lunch. My friend and I were the two who listened as the rest of the crew dived into their lunches. He showed me how to sharpen the Macleod and he basically sharpened it for me. We ate our lunches under a very nice shade tree. As we ate lunch, we watched the cars go by and the other guys had an impromptu touch football game with another crew who were also at the park. I turned to my friend and said, “So this is prison life at a fire camp. I think the next 9 months are going to go by very quickly.” It has been a long road to get to this point, but I am finally here. I am sure some very interesting experiences are ahead of me as we move into fire season. For now I will enjoy one day at a time.

Another Day One

I fell asleep within seconds of hitting the pillow. Unfortunately, I didn’t stay asleep very long. The CO’s came through the dorm with their flashlights. Even though this is a camp, it is still a penal institution and with this comes the consequences which is constant monitoring even during the middle of the night.

I was going to go outside to exercise but the recreation area was closed and so was the television area due to the foolish behavior of a few inmates. I knew breakfast was served at 7:15 am and it was mandatory for everyone to at least go to the designated area for the count. I certainly wanted breakfast and I met up with my friend. I will not invoke my special dietary conditions because I do not want to have any undue attention upon me. The best part of breakfast was the fresh fruit that was served. There was a choice between an apple or an orange. These can be taken out of the dining hall and the “Fruit Nazi” is a distant memory. I was so excited by the fruit, I took both. I didn’t know that only one piece of fruit of allowed at a time. The CO at the end of the food service line gave me a very friendly reminder, “Next time take only one piece of fruit.” He did allow me to take both this time.

At 8:00 am, I was required to check in to see if I had an assignment. Since I had none, I went back to my dorm and started writing. About 15 minutes later, a fellow inmate called me out of the dorm and asked if I wanted to help him paint the break room in the recreation area or rake leaves. I opted for the painting. An hour later all the new campers went to receive their fire gear. There is a whole list which consists of 4 quart sized water bottles, goggles, fire helmet, gloves, rain boots, rain gear, and other items. All told, with the fire bottles full, each backpack weighs about 60 pounds. While fighting a fire and training, I am required to carry this backpack at all times.

Afterward, I went back to painting and as usual I made a mess of myself. I had paint all over my entire body. An hour after I returned to painting, we were given an orientation of the “do’s” and “don’ts” of fire camp. Since there aren’t any locks or gates there are many areas designated “out of bounds”. Any other dorm other than my own is out of bounds. This meant I couldn’t visit my friend since we were in separate dorms. However, this was quickly resolved because during the orientation I learned I was assigned to my friend’s fire crew and my dorm was moved to my friend’s dorm. The dorms are assigned by fire crews. My friend is now three doors down from my room and we could both visit each other.

At dinner I sat with my friend and one of the cooks. He started drilling me about my eating habits and I guess he liked my answers because he told me his goal was to “fatten me up.” He also said, “If I like you, I can see what I can do to get you more of the foods you like.” I’m not sure what will come of this conversation, but I do know having enough food here will not be a problem.

Dinner was concluded and I wanted to speak with the CO regarding a family visit for my wife. I became very confused during this conversation. My wife and children have already been approved. It was my understanding that once this happened, it was good here at fire camp. However, according to this CO, I had to start the process all over again! This could take up to 60 days! If the process has to be started all over again, well, that’s what has to happen.

Transfer

Paul was transferred Wednesday morning to Baustita in Hemet!!!!

Visiting hours are Saturday and Sunday from 8:30 - 2:30

The only requirement to visit is that you have to be on the approval list and to call ahead to make sure he is not gone fighting a fire 951-927-3600.

Paul Del Vacchio F-38991
33015 Baustista Rd.
Hemet, Ca 92544

Amost Poetic

The long awaited “transpack ducat” arrived at 2:00 pm and I was more relieved than anything. Thankfully, my 7 month stay in Jamestown was coming to a close. I went to the store before I left and purchased $50.00 worth of items to take with me and also picked up the eight books that my mother sent me.

When I arrived in Jamestown 7 months go, I was carrying two large plastic bags. As I packed on Tuesday, I had 5 large plastic bags. One bag was dedicated to all the mail I received over these past ten months. Three bags were food due to my peculiar eating habits and one bag was clothing along with a hot pot, bedside lamp, and other assorted non-food items. I certainly accumulated a “few things” along the way.

When the ducat finally arrived, as I mentioned I was very relieved. Five large plastic bags sat next to my bunk for the next three hours until I took them over to Receiving and Release. Everything went fairly slowly at this time because I had nothing to do. I said good-bye to the very nice CO who also seemed relieved to hear I was headed for fire camp. One of my dorm mates came over to pass the time and he actually talked for over 2 ½ hours.

At 3 am, we left for fire camp. The last time I was on a bus like this, I was transported with leg chains and handcuffs. This time no one on the bus needed them and we sat completely unencumbered. There were only 2 CO’s as opposed to 3 nor was there a gun pointed from the rear of the bus. It was a very different ride to say the least.

The bus pulled out of prison and headed south which was almost poetic because my journey which started out back in July has always gone in a northerly direction. Now I was headed to a place which was very close to where I lived with my family for 5 years. I also have some very dear friends in this area. Yes, it was poetic and instead of having a sense of dread, I had a sense of calm. After dropping off several inmates to various fire camps, the bus arrived at its final destination some 8 hours later. Two other inmates and myself got off the bus and went into a van where we arrived at Hemet some 2 hours later. It took 10 ½ hours to arrive but the trip was worth it!

As I was filling out paperwork and having my belongings searched, I found out my friend was indeed instrumental in my transfer to fire camp. Also, a very brief letter I wrote about 2 months ago helped to get my transfer. There were also other influences but these 2 seemed to assure my transfer. Whatever the case I am so happy to be here! After my belongings were searched, I found out my hot pot, bedside lamp, extension cord and stopwatch were not allowed. I don’t understand the stopwatch item, but who am I to argue? As I walked to the dorm, I looked around and found that this fire camp is exactly how I pictured it. It is in the foothill of a small wooded mountain. There are all modular buildings in a camp like setting. There is some construction on the recreation area so the ball field, basketball court, track and handball court are all dug up.

Everything was very quiet as I walked to the dorm. There is a waterfall in the center of the buildings and I could hear the water running. My friend as well as the others were out at work. I share a room with one other person and the room is about 12 feet by 8 feet (96 square feet). This is luxurious compared to where I came from where I shared 18 square feet with 5 other people. There is a desk in the room with two spacious lockers. Each locker stores up to 6 cubic feet which is 6 times larger than the last locker I had at Jamestown. Unbelievably, all of my belongings fit nicely into the new locker and I even have room to spare. At this point the difference between Jamestown and here is more than night and day.

When the fire crews came back, I had to see my friend. We greeted each other with big smiles and a big hug. I was so happy to see him and he seemed equally as happy. He told me he was like a “kid in a candy store” when he was informed I was arriving today. He was a sight for sore eyes and I couldn’t get the big smile off my face. We talked until we had to go to dinner. I told my friend my new release date is February 28, 2008 and he told me his is March 21, 2008. We agreed that this was the best thing about fire camp and now that we are together, everything was great!

Everything here is so different from where I came from. Dinner is served promptly at 5:30 and on the weekends it is served at 5:00. There are no locks on the doors and I could go outside anytime I want. There are no fences or barbed wire. The dining hall reminds me of the Wilderness Adventure in Disney World. The food is scooped out individually and the silverware is real SILVERWARE complete with a knife, fork, and a spoon. I haven’t used a knife and a fork in over 10 months so this was quite a surprise.

After dinner I spoke with my friend and we agreed to see if I could get on his fire crew. He has been so good to me and being on his crew would be great! We agreed that sharing a room might be too much.

I called my wife, even though it was 11:30 her time. She didn’t realize I had transferred because she thought the collect call recording stated Sierra Conservation Center. My wife sounded so relieved I finally made it here. She had a peaceful tone to her voice and she gave me some great news about my daughter who was enrolled in the gifted and talented program. I was so happy and proud! She is a special child and I can’t wait to share her glorious future. As my wife talked something sounded a bit off. I decided to let it go and we used the entire 15 minutes. I met with my friend, talked a bit, and we both decided to call it a night.

Here at Bautista, there are 3 mandatory counts during the day. The first is at breakfast, the second at dinner, and we must be in our bunks at 10:00 pm with lights out. Well, this last count is perfect for me since that is my bedtime and I can say that everyone is now on my schedule with bedtime at 10:00 pm. It was a very good day and I could feel the serenity settle into my being for the first time in over 10 months. I am now past the halfway point of my sentence and I am almost back to where I started. Yes, it has and continues to be a poetic journey.

Mother's Day 2007

I completed my leisurely lunch and it was time for me to write. I didn’t procrastinate and started to write soon after finishing lunch. I wanted to complete my writing so I could start THE 5TH HORSEMAN. There are some days when I struggle to write and other days when I can’t stop. Yesterday was one of the days when I couldn’t stop. I wrote the daily entry for the blog and also wrote my mother a letter. I guess my writing is a bit (okay maybe more than a bit) lengthy which could explain why I had used up the entire afternoon. I continue to be amazed as to how time goes by quickly when I am doing something. When I am in a groove writing, 2 hours pass before I know it. Yesterday, I passed 3 hours without even realizing it. I finally put down my pen and picked up THE 5TH HORSEMAN.

At dinner tonight, I received a very large serving of beans and used the hot dog rolls which are given to the normal eating inmates to make a “bean sandwich”. The beans with the broccoli were very filling - my digestive system has gotten used to this combination – and I was filled for the night. It was back to the dorm to wait for the evening yard to open. While I waited I read some more of the Patterson novel which was very “Pattersonique”. It is a page-turner but as I moved forward quickly I didn’t find an affinity with any of the characters. The first half of the novel seemed to lack depth. It is entertaining but not much more. This is a non-Alex Cross novel and this book is about the Women’s Club. I maybe missing something because I had no emotional attachment to any of the characters. However, one of the best attributes of a Patterson novel is he never seems to waste words.

Since there wasn’t any evening yard over the past few nights, there haven’t been any telephone sign-ups. This meant they were available last night on a first come first serve basis. By the time I arrived all the time slots had been taken. Even my friend could not obtain one and he was outside well before me. I was hoping to call my mother and wish her a Happy Mother’s Day since I don’t have any telephone time tomorrow. I asked the CO who is in charge of the telephones and who also works in the dining hall. She was very pleasant as she usually is and allowed me an 8:45 pm phone call. I realized I would be waking my mother up but I really wanted to talk with her. I called but there was no answer. I tried a second time but still no answer. Since I had the telephone time, I thought I would call my wife because I wanted to hear her voice. I did wake her up and I could hear the grogginess in her voice. It took her a few minutes to wake up but I did most of the talking in the first few minutes. I told my wife what I found out about the transfer and that I was really okay. The only hope of getting to fire camp sooner resided with my friend transferring this week and him working his “magic” to get me transferred this week. My wife was disappointed for me and realized this would further delay her visit. As always my wife was very sympathetic to my plight but we both agreed there isn’t anything either one of us can do to expedite the transfer. At least I know where I stand and won’t be disappointed when Tuesday rolls around.

We moved on to another subject and this is where my wife did most of the talking. I asked her if there was anything new regarding my 401K with my former employer. Unfortunately, there wasn’t but she had some other interesting news she learned from a friend. I would categorize this news as gossip but I was very intrigued as my wife talked. Our time is always limited on the phone and the fact that the evening yard was about to close didn’t help. As she got to the very fascinating part of this story, the telephone was unceremoniously cut-off. My wife was in mid-sentence when the telephone went dead. It was GREAT to hear her voice and even though much of the conversation was gossip, I was so happy I called her. I would like to know the next part of this story but it will have to wait until next Tuesday. I felt very invigorated after speaking with my wife. WE couldn’t say good-bye or I love you because the phone cut-off but I do miss her so much and love her so much, we don’t need the words.

I finished THE 5TH HORSEMAN this morning. The storyline was very compelling but was resolved in one page. It did have some twists and turns but seemed to fall a bit flat. It wasn’t a bad novel but it wasn’t a great one. It was decent and did entertain me. The best part was that it helped pass the time quickly. As always, I was very happy to read a James Patterson novel even though this one wasn’t one of his best in my opinion.

Today is Mother’s Day 2007 and as my wife stated “just another day”. She is right because it is just another day for me. I cannot take care of my children so my wife can have time for herself. I cannot take my wife out for a nice Sunday Brunch or stay home and cook her breakfast. I won’t even see my wife today. These are all part of my consequences of my actions and yes, this is the punishment. Unfortunately, the punishment does not just fall on me as it spills over to my wife, children, family, and friends. I have to always remember this because in a short while I will be with my wife and family and things will hopefully get back to normal. I will be able to take care of my children so my wife can have a day for herself. I will be able to take her to brunch or make her breakfast at home. There will be wonderful times as long as I stay in recovery. My life is filled with blessings and my temporary leave from my family will be over soon enough.

There are many special mothers in my life and I would like to wish all of these Mothers a very Happy Mothers Day! I would like to single out three special mothers. The first one is my mother-in-law. This wonderful woman opened up her home to my family where they have lived for the past 10 months. Her home is filled with so much love and support. She has provided my family with normalcy in a very abnormal situation. Thank you so much and please know I love you very much. Happy Mother’s Day!

The second mother is my mom. My mother has stood behind my family and me since the beginning of this journey, over 2 years ago. I can feel her love all the way across the country. She too, has supplied so much love and support for my family during this very stressful time. My mother has been my conduit to the outside world and I love her so very much. Thank you so much for everything especially your love and support of not only me but the rest of my family. Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!

Last, but certainly not least, is my darling wife. Over the years on Mother’s Day I would say to her, “You’re not my mother.” This is a horrible thing to say even in a joking way. The facts are my wife is the Mother of our children and she is a GREAT mother! My wife is a very strong woman and has maintained nothing but consistency for our children in this very inconsistent time. I put the weight of the world on her shoulders some 2 years ago and she has been carrying it ever since. Not only has she been carrying this weight, she has done it with dignity. My love for my wife continues to grow every second. I love her so very much and thank her for her love and devotion. My wife has displayed love and support for me from the beginning, but more importantly, she maintains nothing but love and caring for our children. I love you Sweetie and miss you so very much! Happy Mother’s Day!

Ten Months In

I waited for the mail call and received notification that my attorney had sent me a letter. “Legal Mail” is the only mail which remains unopened until the inmate is present. It can only be picked up during the hours of 7:00 pm and 8:00 pm daily. The CO opens the letter in the presence of the inmate, inspects it for contraband but is forbidden from reading it due to the attorney-client confidentiality. I picked up the letter later in the evening and it was nothing “earth shattering”. I was hoping to receive a response to my questions but all I received was a letter for my records clarifying another letter my attorney sent out a few weeks ago. I realized hindsight is always 20/20 and I have to live with the decisions I have made but I would be hard pressed to refer my attorney to anyone knowing what I know now. At this point I have to continue with him and I have to accept this fact. Hopefully, he will respond to my questions that have still not been resolved from court.

Dinner came relatively early and I went to the dining hall for the Mexican food dinner. I keep losing my dinner partners and now I am sitting with different members form my dorm. I used to eat breakfast and dinner with a dorm mate but he departed for fire camp. After my fellow Instructor departed, I ate with another dorm mate but he was paroled yesterday. Everyone keeps leaving while I remain here. This last dinner partner was not exactly my favorite as he was a bit hard of hearing and constantly said “huh.” I don’t mind repeating myself but he also said this after he spoke so it was very confusing for me. Also, as he departed (please keep in mind he was going home) yesterday he said, “I will be back.” This was his third time and he is only 31 years old. I tried to speak with him and offer positive words of encouragement, but he would have nothing of it. The prison system in California certainly seems like a revolving door and I am afraid he might be right back. I would have thought being released would be a happy day but he wasn’t very happy. There seems to be something wrong with this equation if someone is reluctant to enter the free world.

I went to sleep at my usual time and had a very strange dream. I was with my son and we were in my younger sister’s neighborhood. It wasn’t where my sister lives now; it was a new neighborhood with mansions. My son and I were in a house across the street. I could see my sister as I looked out the window form the neighboring house. My son and I were alone and were walking through the house and there was a huge picture window. We stopped and noticed what appeared to be a very elderly lady walking down the sidewalk pushing a cart. This older lady was bundled up from head to toe but it was summertime. When I noticed the lady, I felt suspicious but before I could say anything this “older lady” shed her clothes only to reveal a very dark skinned man and an ouzi. He started shooting at us but the picture window was made of bulletproof glass. As soon as he started shooting, I grabbed my son and tucked him underneath me. We realized the bullets weren’t penetrating the glass or the house and then we got up. We walked around the house and my son was not frantic at all, he was very calm. I looked at another window where I could see my younger sister in her house giving me the thumbs up sign to show everything’s all right. My son and I continued to walk around the house and I discovered it was impenetrable from the outside. The house belonged to a senator and I felt safe in spite of the would be terrorist shooting outside. This is where I woke up and it is funny how I can easily recall this dream while others I cannot. I am not going to play amateur psychologist and if anyone is into interpreting dreams – by all means feel free.

Today marks 10 months into my sentence. The time is moving quickly and technically I have 14 months to go. When I arrive to fire camp my sentence will be reduced further. IF I move next week, (yes, it would be a MIRACLE) I would have 9 ½ months to go.

Today’s breakfast was the scrambled egg bean burrito with my favorite hot cereal with cinnamon. I gladly gave away the eggs but no one wanted the beans and I cannot eat these in the morning because it wreaks havoc on my body. I was able to obtain two more servings of the cereal. I was having a hard time eating the rice cereal this morning because the kitchen workers were very sloppy in their distribution of the foods. The scrambled eggs spilled over into the rice cereal and my aversion to eggs was hindering me from eating the rice cereal. I spent most of the time picking out the scrambled eggs and eating around them. Yes, I received a total of 3 servings of cereal but ended up eating only one as I couldn’t get over the fact that the scrambled eggs infiltrated my cereal. Yes, I know I have a problem!

The process of picking up my books went fairly smoothly and I only had to wait 30 minutes. My mother sent me THE 5TH HORSEMAN by James Patterson and PROMISE ME by Harlan Coben. I have detailed in the past how much I enjoy the Patterson novels and am looking forward to reading the book. Harlan Coben is one of my mother’s favorite authors so I am equally looking forward to reading this book as well. I don’t recall ever reading a Coben book before which is surprising because my mother raves about his novels. I was thankful to have received the books and now I can fill in my downtime with some more reading.

Theory and Reality

In keeping with the entry from yesterday, I will continue with the story regarding the old coach and my pending transfer to fire camp. This morning I was hoping to see the old coach as a follow-up to our conversation of yesterday. When I went out into the yard to start the PFT Class, I quickly checked his office but he wasn’t there. At the end of the class I even asked the new coach if I could go into the gym to see the old coach and he said, “Yes.” However, he still wasn’t in his office. As an aside, the new coach came out into the afternoon yard and stopped by me as I was exercising. As soon as he saw me he said, “Don’t you ever stop exercising?” and he laughed.

I said, “No, I can never get enough.” And laughed as well. He then asked me about my transfer to fire camp. I told him it’s taking me longer than I expected and he said if there is anything he could do to let me know and he would be more than happy to write a letter in my behalf. I thanked him and would let him know. Unfortunately, a letter will not help me get to fire camp faster. What I need is someone who knows how to work the system. The new coach has not been here long enough to know this and that is why I put my trust into the old coach.

This afternoon I went by the gym door to see if the old coach was in his office and thankfully his light was on in his office. Normally, I would be apprehensive to enter the gym for a number of reasons but not today. There are some CO’s who guard the gym door who do not allow the instructors entry. However, I walked by the CO with much confidence and without saying a word, walked over to the old coach’s office. I peeked inside and he was sitting at his desk. I knocked and went in. He told me to sit down and when he told me that I thought to myself “Oh boy, this can’t be good.” He told me he went to the Captain’s office yesterday, but he wasn’t there. The old coach left my letter with the Captain’s secretary and as of yet hasn’t heard anything back. Again I thought to myself, “Here I go again not knowing what is going on.” He called the Captain and this conversation lasted a few minutes and I could tell by listening to the old coach I wasn’t going to find out my status. I was right because the Captain said he would have to check some things out and he would get back to him.

After chatting with the old coach, much to my surprise the telephone rang and it was the Captain calling back. The old coach had a lot of concern in his face as he was talking to the Captain. Yet again, my heart sank and thought something was wrong. According to the Captain, inmates who are going to Fire Camp and are flagged do not automatically go to the top of the list. Now there is an order and right now they are taking inmates who completed their fire fighting requirements in January. Since I completed these in March, I have to wait a few more weeks – most likely a month or more.

This is where it gets tricky – so please bear with me. I do understand the need for order in selecting inmates to go to fire camp; however, this is a grand “theory” proposed by the Captain. In “reality” inmates are being transferred to fire camp out of order. Case in point – 7 members of my FTP Class have already been transferred to fire camp, yet I am still waiting. It seems to me, the Captain is following this theory, but others who are responsible for transfers are not adhering to this theory. This Captain is only one of the many “decision makers” regarding fire camp transfers, but he is my only contact. I explained all of this to the old coach and he did understand, but he is very much by the book.

There was another coach in the office at the time and she had another idea which was to call the fire camp directly. She did this for an instructor of hers and placed him in the fire camp. Yes, it took three months but this was another option. As it turns out, this fire camp is the same one I would like to go to. I could tell the old coach was not going to do this since he is much by the book. Later on he told me, “I can’t call the fire camp directly because this would be going behind the Captain’s back. I can’t do this because the Captain has ALWAYS been good to me.” I understood and told the old coach that I certainly didn’t want him to do something he can’t do in good conscience.

When the old coach was speaking with the Captain, he did some very favorable things on my behalf such as stating, “He is one of the most conscientious Instructors I have ever had.” This was good to hear and also I don’t know quite what transpired the first 2 times the old coach spoke with the Captain, but I do believe he did speak with him. I’m also not sure why the rules have changed for me but apparently they have. Even the old coach remarked, “You have every right to be angry that these rules have now changed.” I’m not angry at all, this is all part of things I have no control over and I truly accept this. I was hoping to be transferred last month and it didn’t happen. Now I hope to be transferred by July. I really thought being an Instructor would have some “juice” into getting to fire camp quickly, but now it appears not to be the case for me. There is a reason for all this – perhaps it is a test of my patience and resolve. I will remain resolute to my recovery and my patience remains solid. I will remain positive and hope to be transferred by July.

Although the outcome of speaking with the old coach wasn’t what I wanted, I was happy to receive this information. Now I know where I stand and I know the Captain is indeed aware of me. I am not just a file in a stack of papers. Whether this helps expedite things, I doubt, but I have truly done all that I can do and now it is time to sit back and wait. So goes the saga of getting my transfer to fire camp quickly and now I will concentrate on staying positive each and everyday.

A quick aside – I received a letter from one of my dear friends I haven’t heard from in awhile. It was postmarked April 1st! This letter was from Canada, but 40 days for delivery seems like much! Also, this dear friend has sent me another letter which I have yet to receive. I wonder where they are? There was some unfortunate news in one of the letters. All I can say is life is so precious and no one knows what tomorrow will bring.

Pizza, Pizza, Pizza!

Yesterday afternoon when the yard opened, I had two things I wanted to accomplish. I wanted to call my wife and pick up the books that were sent to me on Monday. In the outside world, these tasks are very easy, but in here they are indeed chores. I was finally able to make that call and went through the bail bond company to save my wife some money for the cost of the call. I tried her at home but there wasn’t any answer, then I tried her on her cell, which went to voice mail. I really wanted to talk to someone so I tried my mother’s house but there was no answer. Afterward I tried to call her cell phone and once again it went to voice mail. I decided to call my wife’s cell phone again and leave a message. Amazingly, my wife answered and I did get to speak with her. I was also able to speak with both my daughter and son briefly, and it is always great hearing their voices. My poor son has such bad allergies and I could hear it in his voice. My wife has taken him to the doctor’s and he gave him allergy medication and eye drops. He’s having such a horrible time with this season’s allergies. In the brief time I spoke with him, I felt so bad listening to his very nasally voice. I certainly hope allergy season is over soon!

My wife is still dealing with the same financial issues that she has been dealing with over the last two months and she is no closer to resolution on any of the matters. She has been trying to obtain some money in my 401K, but my former employer (yes, the same one I stole from) is giving her a very hard time. At the conclusion of my case, the prosecuting attorney withdrew any rights to this money which meant it would go to my wife. However, accessing these funds has been very difficult and my wife can certainly use the money. Hopefully, she will have a positive resolution soon so she won’t have to resort to legal measures. She is also still dealing with getting the car registered in NJ, but the state tax issue remains unresolved. My wife even received assistance from a local assembly person in NJ. She was on the telephone for two hours regarding this issue and she still has no resolution on this as well. I can feel my wife’s frustration as I share it with her. Unfortunately, I can’t help her from here and I am truly powerless to these situations. I was interested if my wife had a chance to call the Captain regarding my transfer to fire camp, but after hearing her problems, my transfer to fire camp became insignificant.

The telephone call was over and I went to the R&R area where I needed to pick up the books. Unfortunately, I missed the pick-up by just a few minutes which I thought might happen. I headed back to the dorm after doing my exercising and only had a half of sandwich for lunch so I could be hungry for dinner. Pizza was back on the menu and was being served last night. I made my usual deal with my neighbors obtaining their pizza for 3 soups each. Also, my neighbor on the other side made me an offer of trading his pizza to me for only one soup. The reason why his price was cheaper than my other neighbors was I could obtain his pizza in the dining hall as he is a member of a race I can trade food with in the dining hall whereas as my neighbors are members of a different race where I cannot exchange food with in the dining hall. This means this means they have to bring the pizza back to the dorm and they’re making an exchange is acceptable. Got that? In summary, I had pizza, pizza, pizza!

I received two pieces of mail – one from a dear friend and one inter-prison mail also referred to as “jail-mail”. This piece of mail was very important because it was a request I sent to the Captain regarding my transfer to fire camp. I sent this over two weeks and this was his response. This was the Captain that the “old coach” was supposedly in communications with. I wanted to know which fire camp I was earmarked for and how long it would take. Please remember the old coach told me over two weeks ago I was earmarked for a fire camp and I should be departing “very soon.” Well, the information I received yesterday seemed to contradict the old coach. According to the captain I have not been earmarked for any fire camp and I am 40th on the list. This was extremely bad news and it also contradicted the information I received 1-½ weeks ago from the relief CO who called regarding my status on the fire camp placement list. At this time I was number 30 and as of yesterday I was number 40! If I am indeed number 40 on the list, I will be here at least another 8 weeks which takes me into July. Also, the fact that I am NOT earmarked for a fire camp means I can end up at any one of the 19 fire camps in the system.

I had no idea what was going on after I read this piece of “jail-mail”. It certainly wasn’t good from my perspective and I needed to do something. The only thing I could do is write the old coach a note asking for his assistance in clearing up these issues. I have nowhere else to turn and I do believe in the old coach because he is a man of his word. I didn’t believe he was lying to me about speaking with the Captain and there had to be a mix-up somewhere. I wrote a letter to the coach explaining the situation and asked for his assistance. This is my only hope in finding out what was indeed going on. I realized if I put this in the mail last night the old coach wouldn’t receive it until Friday but getting access to his office is very difficult so I had to place it in the mailbox. (I am going to skip forward at this point because this story is fairly important to me) I’m not sure who prevented me from placing this in the mailbox but this happened. I was ready to put it in after dinner but something happened on the other yard (a mini-riot between members of the same race – sort of). Dinner was served very late which meant I couldn’t get to the mailbox. I was going to give the letter to one of my dorm mates who goes out for “pill call” later in the day. “Pill call” never came so again I had to hold onto the letter.

The timing of placing this letter in the mailbox is fairly important because the mail is picked up each night at 10:00 pm. Since I couldn’t get it in by then, the old coach wouldn’t receive this letter until Monday. However, as I was going out this morning for “work call”, I noticed that the door to where the old coach is located was open. I quickly slipped it under the door and made my way out to the basketball court. Hence, the new coach did not see me do this.

Somehow, someway things always seem to work out. Had I placed this letter in the mailbox last night, the old coach might have overlooked it for a few days. Now it would be the first thing he saw as he walked into the office. The old coach read my letter and made a special trip to see me in my dorm. He had my letter in his hand and said, “I don’t know what is going on because I spoke with the Captain on two occasions and this does not make sense.” He subsequently asked me for my two fire camp choices and wrote them down. He then said, “Let me see what is going on right now,” and headed directly to the captain’s office.

I was very impressed he came to see me and I do believe he is doing what he said. I haven’t heard back from him yet but I am very optimistic as to my transfer. My mood went from being a bit depressed yesterday to very positive after speaking with the old coach. I feel good and hopefully I will hear from him tomorrow morning!

Not Yet

I went back outside for the afternoon session of PFT Plus yesterday. We lost our best instructor (my fitness rival) as he finally got into the Firefighter Training Program after a long wait. I was very happy for him because he deserved it more than anyone, but I was sad to see him go. He was the longest standing instructor, and now I am the longstanding instructor. Earlier in the PFT class, I decided to take a step back and let another instructor handle the duties; however, for PFT Plus, I had to take charge because everyone was just standing around. I didn’t want to stand around in the 90-degree heat, nor did the inmate participants. I was very surprised because 6 inmates actually showed up for the PFT Plus class in spite of the soaring temperatures. I was all about getting the class started and did so without problems. The class went well, but I was preoccupied looking for the clerks who pass out the fire camp ducats. They have passed them out as early as 12:30 p.m. to as late as 2:30 p.m. I was in this window and did not see them yet. Also, my friend was very curious to see the clerks as well, and he was my second set of eyes. The PFT Plus class finished without my seeing any of the clerks.

I had some nervous energy and decided to run a few miles. One of the instructors wanted to run with me, and I told him I was planning on doing 8 miles, which takes about an hour. He thought this would be too fast for him but did give it a try. Well, after 1-1/2 miles, he told me to go on, and one lap after he stopped, but I continued. As I continued, I had my eyes peeled for the clerks. I finally spotted them as I got to my 6th mile. One of the clerks even stopped by my dorm to drop a ducat off. This meant someone in my dorm would be departing today. There are 8 dorm members (including me) who are waiting for the transfer to fire camp. My bunkie has been waiting the longest (15 weeks), and I really thought if only one ducat was dropped off at my dorm, he would be the one to depart. I continued to run, and as I ran by my dorm, I figured one of my dorm mates would have yelled out to me that I received a ducat. No one yelled to me, so my transfer would have to wait as I was not yet going to fire camp. I decided to cut my run short at 7 miles and go over to my dorm to see who received a ducat. This ducat that was passed into my dorm was a mistake. It was for an inmate in another dorm, so no one from my dorm will be departing today, and we all have to wait until next Tuesday.

At this point, my friend joined up with me, and he, too, did not receive a ducat. My friend will be here with me for at least another week. He was disappointed, but selfishly, I was glad that he was staying with me. I may have been a bit disappointed if he, who has been waiting 2 weeks, got transferred to fire camp. At least we can commiserate together, and I won’t feel abandoned. As for me, I was disappointed even though my expectations and hopes were low. I have to keep reminding myself fire camp will happen. It is just a matter of time, and this is happening for a reason. I was down, but just like the previous weeks, I won’t let it get me down for very long. I have emotions, and I have to process those emotions. I can’t just say, “Oh, well”, and move on. It is, indeed, a process as I fell disappointed initially but then I started the cycle all over again. My friend and I took turns cheering each other up, and we went back to our dorm with smiles on our faces. This is my recovery (all of it), and it continues to make me a better person. I am not going to moan, groan, or belabor the fact I have yet to be transferred to fire camp. My life goes on, and the days tick on by. I will be reunited with my family soon enough.

I went inside my dorm for my afternoon ritual. I washed my clothes and shaved while securing the second spot for the shower. I decided to drown my sorrows in a PB & banana sandwich along with a glass of lemonade. Now that I will be here for another week, I can open more of my food. At this rate, I will have very little food to take with me to fire camp! I recently traded for a bag of hot & spicy Chex Mix. I needed to trade off my excess beans, and my neighbor was willing to accept my offer. I opened the bag of Chex Mix and had some with my PB & banana sandwich. I am very judicious when I open bags of chips or pretzels. I intend to make this bag of Chex Mix last until next Tuesday. It is a small bag (only 8.75 ounces), but I should make it last until next Tuesday. I completed my late lunch, and I didn’t have to wait long for the shower. I got into the shower second and treated myself with the very fragrant Head and Shoulders shampoo. The shower wasn’t scalding hot, but it was hot enough. With the temperature well into the 90’s, it would have been nice to control the water temperature. This is certainly not the case. I have to take what I can get, and the bottom line was I got clean. The mail call arrived after my shower, and surprisingly, I didn’t receive anything. It appears the mailroom goes in streaks because yesterday there was very little mail for anyone in my dorm. After getting shut out of the mail call (to the surprise of my dorm mates), I returned to my bunk and started writing. I wrote until the dinner release arrived.

Dinner was over, and it was back to the dorm to wait for the evening yard to open. I anxiously awaited the evening yard to open because I wanted to pick up the books which were sent to me. I waited, but the evening yard never opened. Not only did I not get to pick up the books, I couldn’t place a telephone call to my wife informing her I will be here at least another week. I don’t know why the evening yard never opened, but I was relegated to the dorm all evening. As soon as I realized it was not going to open, I returned to my bunk and listened to the New York Mets/San Francisco Giants baseball game on the radio. The Mets did much better last night winning the game 4-1. It appears the Mets have a solid team, and if their pitching holds up, they should make the playoffs. I am not sold on their pitching staff, but so far so good. I had a little difficulty listening to the broadcast because the reception was spotty. The radio station is out of San Francisco, and I am currently 120 miles east of San Francisco. It comes in very well during the day but sporadically at night. In order to get some type of reception last night, I had to move the radio all over my bunk. This continued as I listened to the game, but the good part was I passed the entire evening doing this and then went to sleep at my usual time.

Unlike the previous night when I slept all the way through, I did have to get up once during the night. Other than that, I had a good night’s sleep. I had a dream which included my wife, and in this dream, it was my wife’s face. This was a very peaceful dream as the 2 of us (no children) were at an ice cream store (where I don’t know because it did not look familiar) holding hands and talking. My wife ordered an ice cream sundae, and I ordered a frozen yogurt (of course!). Nothing much else happened in the dream, and I woke up feeling very good. As I woke up, it was time for me to get out of my bunk and start my day. This also meant the “cycle” started once again for the 10th time as I gear up for next Tuesday on whether or not I will be transferred to fire camp. It is hard to believe I am going into my 10th week since I completed the fire training program because even though I have not been transferred to fire camp, this time still has gone by quickly.

My morning routine was the same, and that memo which was distributed at the beginning of the week became nonsensical. I guess there needs to be a learning curve with the method of communication from the CO’s. I appreciate the attempt at keeping the inmates informed, which is a big departure from no communication whatsoever. Now if they can stick with what they say, things will get even better. Unfortunately, what that memo stated and what actually happened were 2 different things. This meant the breakfast release came late instead of early, which is really not so bad since I got to enjoy Good Morning America this morning. We were watching the Today Show, but the reception on this channel became terribly scratchy, and I made the “executive” decision to change the channel. As I changed the channel, my dorm mates thanked me. Apparently, no one wanted to change the channel, but when I did it on my own, everyone was grateful. “Good Morning America” is not a bad morning show. In fact, it is as good as the Today Show. I might make “GMA” the preferred morning show for the dorm if the static continues on the Today Show.

The very late breakfast release arrived, and it was of to the dining hall for one of the breakfasts that I don’t trade away. One week Danish is served, the next week cinnamon rolls, and the following week cinnamon coffee cake is served. This is a 3-week rotation, and today it was the cinnamon coffee cake. The “Fruit Nazi” was very lonely because prunes were served and there wasn’t any fruit to steal. As I walked out of the dining hall, I wished him a “good day”. It was back to the dorm where I would wait for the work call in order to start day 2 of the PFT class. The work call arrived, and I made my way over to the basketball court.

This morning I decided to assert more of a role for myself than yesterday. Now that the head instructor has departed to the Firefighter Training Program, I have the next seniority and seem to know what is going on. I like direction, and my fellow instructors lack this. It does bother me when things are disorganized. This is why I asserted myself this morning. Unlike yesterday where the coach talked incessantly, he had to be somewhere in less than 2 hours, and the class worked out more. We were able to do a 3-mile power walk, which I led, and a 1-mile run, which I also led. We even did sets of sprints, and I actually enjoyed doing these today. I was nowhere near the fastest, but as we continued doing more sets, I was at the front for the last sets. This is where my endurance came in. Everyone, including my fellow instructors, was winded except for me. I do like to test my fitness level from time to time, and today, I passed with flying colors. Keeping with the theme of testing my fitness level, I decided to run a mile by myself after the class was over to see how fast I could run it. I was able to complete the mile in 6 minutes and 25 seconds, and I believe I could have gone faster. One mile equals 3 laps, and my time for the first lap was 2 minutes 11 seconds; second lap 2 minutes 9 seconds; and the third lap 2 minutes 5 seconds. I improved every lap, and as I watch other people run, their times always seem to decline the further they run. I felt very invigorated when I completed this brisk mile run (at least for me). It was a good way to close out a very good morning exercise session. A few minutes after I completed the mile run the yard was closed, and I had to return to my dorm.

I went inside the dorm and did an abdominal workout session. I need to do more of these as my stomach is my problem child. Sure, my stomach is flat to the point it is concave, but I am not happy with it. (Yes, I am aware I have mental problems!) I will incorporate more abdominal exercises into my daily routine just to appease my brain. After the AB session was complete, I had a snack of a South Beach protein bar. I broke down and opened the box. I have never had these until today, and I thought it was quite delicious. It did satisfy any hunger I had, and it was a good snack to hold me over for the next 3 hours. The lunch period was a bit extended today, so I had more time before the afternoon yard opened. I spent the time reading a Prisoners Advocate Newsletter. This newsletter is published by Saunders and Associates legal firm out of West Sacramento, California. The material in this newsletter was very informative. If anyone is interested in reading their newsletter, please go to www.justiceforall.tv and sign up. I believe the information will open a lot of eyes on what really happens in the California prison system. Yes, I broke the law, and I am paying the consequences for my law breaking, but I continue to learn so much about myself and other issues. Some of these other issues have to deal with the California prison system itself, and all I can say is thank God I have a support network of family and friends because so many inmates have no support system. These inmates are trapped in a horrible cycle of “catch, release, catch, release” and so on. The system is broken, but John and Jane Q. Public just don’t care. The politicians tow the hard line of “tough on crime” and criminals should be locked away. I’m not sure when California became such an uncaring state, but this is what has happened. When people can be incarcerated for not committing a crime, I believe there is a BIG problem. The system is overcrowded, and with the latest reform proposal, the system will only become more crowded. I realize there is big political machinery at work in the prison guards union, and they are extremely effective; however, if the present system continues in California, the state will go bankrupt. This won’t happen next year or the year after, but it will happen. Incarceration is a costly process, and right now, the only people prospering are the CO’s. This may be a naïve thought, but if less and less people are sent to prison, people will lose jobs. I know there will always be bad people who require prison sentences, but California appears to have so many more than any other state. I wonder what is the real reason behind this.

Uh-Oh Tuesday!

Yesterday, the afternoon yard opened only a few minutes late, and I was back into the yard walking toward the basketball court for the afternoon session of PFT Plus class. A few inmates did show up for this class, and we, the instructors, decided on doing the very easy Monday class. I was up for another session of the very difficult Friday class, but no one shared my feelings, so I was outvoted. Yes, the Monday class is very easy, but with the temperature approaching 94 degrees, even the easy classes become challenging. One of the other instructors who was here last year said the temperature reached 118 degrees in June. Now that’s hot!!! I certainly hope I don’t have to experience temperatures like these because it would mean I am still here and not at fire camp. Anyhow, the class went off without a hitch. After the class I wanted to do another 45 minutes on the Harvard Wall and did so. This gave me 2-1/2 hours’ worth of vigorous exercise for the day, and in spite of the rising temperatures, I felt very good when I was done.

As I completed the Harvard Wall, I met up with my friend, and we talked a few minutes together before I went inside for the 2:45 p.m. unlock. I had my friend all to myself, and of course we talked about the possibility of being transferred this week. My friend found out there are 5 openings at one of the fire camps in southern California. He didn’t know if these openings fit our category, but it was an encouraging sign. My friend was still awaiting word on his alternative plan. We once agreed it would be great if we were both transferred this week; however, we came to the conclusion that we should not share a dorm. The fire camp both of us want to be transferred to has 2-man dorms. We thought we would be pushing our friendship a bit too much if we were to share a dorm together. I agree, and as long as we are at the same fire camp, that is all that matters. I didn’t want to get my hopes up too high as we spoke about the fire camp transfer since I thought I would have been gone by now. My friend has taken my place venting about the transfer to fire camp. We both wondered what would take place the next day.

The 2:45 p.m. unlock arrived, and I went into my dorm for my afternoon ritual. Yes, I washed my clothes, and I forgot to mention that one of my dorm mates had bleach on Sunday which he gave me along with a plastic bag. I was able to soak my very used workout underwear in the bleach, and they came out just like they were brand new. I was amazed how white the underwear turned and how freshly clean they smelled. I am no longer scared to wear them as they are very clean.

After washing and hanging my clothes, I had secured the first position for the shower. At this point, I went back to my bunk to wait for the shower to come on, and I made myself a late lunch. I did make the PB and banana sandwich, which was delicious. I also ate the other half of the power bar. I am getting enough nutrition, but I feel like a bottomless pit. When I finished the PB and banana sandwich, I still felt hungry, so I had some crackers. I had to separate myself from the crackers or I would have eaten all of them. I finally stopped myself from eating and listened to the radio while still waiting for the shower to come on. As I was listening to the radio, I discovered the San Francisco Giants were playing the New York Mets which meant I could listen to the game on the radio. This would be the first Mets game I have witnessed (or at least listened to) since they lost Game 7 in the National League Championship series last October. This will give me something to do in the evening besides watching Heroes. The shower finally turned on, and I got in very quickly. Yes, the downside to being first is the shower in the shower is the prospect of being scalded as the water is extremely hot. I did my best to go quickly, but it took me a few minutes to get underneath the showerhead. The water finally got a little cooler, and I went about my business. I was in and out in no time as many of my dorm mates were waiting.

I returned to my bunk where I started writing but was interrupted when the mail call arrived. I received 3 items in the mail; 2 letters and 1 notification that someone had sent me a book or books. This was very surprising since I was not expecting anything. I wonder who sent the book or books and which book or books are they. I won’t find out until I go out to R&R to pick them up. This is always an adventure, and I am hoping to pick them up this evening, or if for some reason I am being transferred to fire camp this week, I can pick the package up when I take my property to R&R. This would be the best scenario, but who knows. Anyhow, the other letters were from dear friend who I have not heard from in a while and my mom. As I read my dear friend’s letter, it contained “The Secret.” Apparently, my friend has incorporated “The Secret” into everyday life, and it is working wonders. The odd think about this is my friend does not have any idea I have heard about “The Secret”, and as I read the letter, I got chills. I can’t wait to read it and apply it to my everyday life, even in here. My friend’s letter had a great deal of excellent information, and I was very inspired while I was reading it. Again, I have so many blessings in my life and so many special people in my life. I am so grateful.

Normally, I refrain from the weekly offering of filet of fish dinner; however, last night baked potatoes were on the menu with the filet of fish. I haven’t had a baked potato in a while, so I thought I would go to the dining hall just for those baked potatoes. I thought the dinner release would arrive earlier than it has been because the day seemed to go better with the release; however, dinner was once again after 7 p.m. There is a long lag between yard closure and dinner. Yesterday, I passed this time by writing and just relaxing. The dinner release finally arrived, and it was off to the dining hall. My “real” vegetarian meal does consist of eating fish; however, I cannot eat that fish patty, so I invoke my vegetarian status. Last night I was very fortunate because, in lieu of the fish patty, I received not 1 but 2 baked potatoes and 2 packets of peanut butter. My life has been so simplified over these past 10 months that I was very happy to receive the 2 baked potatoes. I ate them along with the salad and spinach. I wasn’t exactly full from this dinner as lately my appetite has seemed to increase. I wasn’t sure if I was done eating for the evening as the baked potatoes were a good change of pace, but I wasn’t full. I returned to the dorm where I did make a PB&J sandwich to satisfy my hunger. This was not a weird happenstance, but I felt I needed to eat more, so the PB&J sandwich fit the bill.

Last night was not an evening yard so I was relegated to the dorm for the evening. The evening was shortened considerably due to the late dinner release. I had completed all of my writing so I listened to the New York Mets and San Francisco Giants game on the radio. I tuned in just in time to hear my Mets commit 2 errors which led to 4 runs and a 6-1 lead by the Giants. My Mets did not fare too well as they ended up losing 9-4. It was good to listen to the game in spite of the Mets poor play.

Last night was also a “Heroes” night, and I made my way into the television area at 9 a.m. to view the episode. There are only 3 episodes remaining in the season, and I was not very impressed with the episode last night. My dorm mates were getting very bored with the episode, and for the first time all season, several of them departed the television area before the end of the episode. If this continues, my dorm mates may give up on “Heroes” and switch back to “24.” It is a good thing that now, after last night’s episode, there are only 2 more episodes remaining. I think my dorm mates will endure the last 2 episodes, but if the action does not pick up, “Heroes” may not be on the dorm’s viewing schedule next season. Hopefully, I will be at fire camp before the next television season starts (September) because, if I am still here by then, I might have pulled out all my hair by then! Anyhow, the very disappointing episode of “Heroes” ended, and it was time for me to go to sleep.

Amazingly, I made it all the way through the night without getting up once! I really believe this has something do with the hot weather. I do seem to stay in my bunk when the weather is warmer as opposed to cooler. I’m not sure why this occurs, but it does seem to be the case. I had a dream-filled night, and the theme of people’s faces changing continued. I had a dream that involved my wife, but although my wife had the same name, her face did not look anything like her. Her voice was the same, but it was as if another person had taken over. I was sort of shaken when I woke up because I couldn’t believe this was actually my wife. Unlike the previous night’s dream where my GA friends had different faces and I accepted them as my friends, last night I could not accept this being my wife. Yes, it was very strange.

It was time for me to get out of my bunk and start my day. My early morning ritual was the same, but today is Tuesday, uh oh! This means the ducats for the fire camp transfers are out later in the afternoon. I have tempered my optimism because I have been disappointed over the past few weeks. Even my friend’s alternate plan will take another week or 2 to come to fruition. My expectations were low, and normally my hopes would be high, but my hopes were constantly wavering. Also, today was day 1 of the PFT class, and that cycle was starting all over once again. I completed my morning ritual, and the breakfast release was later than yesterday. Interestingly, a memo was circulated yesterday regarding the breakfast release this week. I was very impressed that there was a method of communication to us inmates from the CO’s; however, after reading the memo, I thought something was going to happen, but it did not. According to the memo, breakfast this morning should have been earlier than usual. As it turned out, it was later than usual. Not many of my dorm mates read the memo and those who did interpreted it differently than me. I thought I was going crazy, so I asked my dorm mates to read the memo again. When they read it again, they did agree with my interpretation that breakfast should have been earlier than normal. At lest this validated that I was NOT going crazy. I have to realize not many people, both inmates and CO’s, think like I do, which is why I have to remain flexible. I did remain flexible and got to enjoy most of the Today Show.

I was able to view a segment on the Today Show which displayed alternative sentences handed out by judges. These were alternatives to prison for nonviolent offenders. These sentences ranged from community service to wearing a billboard which stated “We will not steal from Wal-Mart”, to a woman being left overnight in the woods to fend for herself (in response to her crime of abandoning kittens in the woods). There appears to be a very forward-thinking judge in Ohio who hands out these alternative sentences, and the reason why he hands out these sentences is “Prison does not work.” Yes, that was the direct quote from the judge. Unfortunately, one of the examples came from California which has the nation’s most overcrowded prisons. At the end of the segment, Matt Lauer made a comment which stated he thought these alternative sentences were a great idea because the prison systems all across the country are overcrowded and “screwed up.” Unfortunately, my state of California seems to take the opposite stance on sentencing, and there is one state legislator who has gone on record saying, “There is no such thing as a nonviolent felon.” California has adopted the “tough on crime” stance and does not appear to be leaning anywhere near these alternative sentences. Could it be better or worse than California’s recidivism rate of 70%? It is interesting how things work out because had there been an early release for breakfast, I would have missed this segment, so it worked out very well.

The breakfast release arrived, and it was off to the dining hall. I refrained from putting my peanut butter into the creamed mush because this may have led to my stomach problems on Sunday. I traded away my egg for more creamed mush and was satisfied with breakfast. I returned to the dorm where I would wait for the work call in order to start the PFT class. The wait wasn’t too bad (45 minutes), and before I knew it, I was going outside to start the PFT class. The temperature was in the 80’s at 9 a.m. this morning and rising. This was the warmest day since I arrived here back in October. According the “old coach”, if the temperature reaches 90 degrees, the PFT class has to be suspended; however, according the “new coach”, the temperature has to reach 95 degrees for the PFT class to be suspended. I had to bite my tongue when the “new coach” spoke of this. I really wanted to ask him why the discrepancy, but I remained silent. In fact, I remained silent for the entire class. I must admit the “new coach’s” lack of organization does drive me crazy, especially with the first day of class. He is all over the place, and very little gets done. The class met for 2-1/2 hours this morning, and we only got in 2 miles of jogging and little else. The “new coach” loves to talk, and he did so today. I found some shade and kept out of the way counting the minutes for the afternoon.

Honestly, the PFT class goes by quickly, but this morning it dragged on because we didn’t do much. I prefer to keep moving, and boom, before you know it, the class is over and so is the morning. Quite the opposite occurred today, but I did get through it without getting myself in trouble. Speaking of getting in trouble, one of my fellow instructors received a write-up for not getting down right away when an alarm sounded. This happened last week when it was raining, and he was searching for a dry spot, but the CO took offense to the fact he did not get down right away. This is significant because he, too, is waiting for a transfer to fire camp, and this write-up will delay the transfer even further. He does have some recourse to defend himself, but usually, these are not overturned. It really is a tenuous existence as I wait for the transfer to fire camp. I have no intention of doing anything wrong; however, last week I did the same thing as my fellow instructor. The only difference was a CO was not near me when I found a dry spot to lie down on. Conceivably, I could have received a write-up, and thankfully, I did not. I am holding my collective breath until I am safely at fire camp. I felt bad for my fellow instructor, but there was nothing I could do.

The long, drawn-out, PFT class day 1 finally came to a close, and I went inside by dorm for the lunch period. The class cut the lunch period shorter than usual, and I only had a snack of almonds as I prepared to do some running in the afternoon. The lunch period was over very quickly, and it was back outside for the afternoon session.