Magnificent Weekend!!!

It has been a fantastic weekend and it all started yesterday meeting with yet another fabulous Gamblers Anonymous birthday celebration. This was a multiple birthday celebration with three members all celebrating birthday. Two of the members were celebrating three years in the program and the other member was celebrating two years. I had the honor and privilege to chair the meeting and it hardly seems it has been two years since I last chaired one of the birthday celebrant’s first birthday celebrations. At that meeting two years ago my sponsor was also celebrating their birthday I would be remiss if I didn’t wish my sponsor a very happy birthday as he moves into his 17th year as an integral part of Gamblers Anonymous.

I was so happy to chair the meeting yesterday and I specifically postponed my golf game with my good friends who I was meeting in Palm Springs later in the afternoon. I do seek balance in my life and right now my life is out of balance because my wife and children are 3,000 miles away. I do believe once they return next month balance will be restored to my life so for the time being I will continue doing the very best I can. GA is a huge part of my life but it is not my life. I am not very good at doing things in moderation and I need a great deal of work in this area. GA is an incredibly important facet of my life because without it I have no life but I am doing my best to be more rounded.

My good friends had set up a “boys” weekend of golf in Palm Springs which is about an hour and a half away from where I live. My friends were driving in from Las Vegas and we were rekindling our annual golf trip. I had known about this for a few weeks and in the meantime my dear friends from GA had asked me to chair the birthday celebration. I certainly could not say no because I didn’t want to say no. It was much easier to explain to my good friends why I wouldn’t be able to make an earlier tee time yesterday. I have many understanding friends and these friends were no exception. They completely understood and I was able to chair the meeting, enjoy a very special meeting, drive to Palm Springs and play golf with my good friends. This is a well rounded weekend and if my family were here I wouldn’t have gone to Palm Springs so things tend to work out the very best.

The birthday meeting was very special yesterday for a few reasons. The first and most important reason had to do with the birthday celebrants who all give back to the program. Two of the three celebrants I know very well and we all basically came into GA at the same time (I only had a few months more in the program). One of the celebrants came to visit me at the very special GA meeting/visits on a regular basis and another also came to see me. If it weren’t for people like the three that celebrated their birthdays yesterday GA will cease to exist. It is a program of people helping people and each of these people have helped me tremendously.

The second reason had to do with a very special person who came to the meeting that I hadn’t seen in a very long time. This person and I had shared a very special bond since we both attended our first meeting on the same day over three years ago. I had gotten to know this person well over the years and this person did write to me when I was in prison. I was wondering if I would see this person again because I had heard that this very special person to me had strayed away from the program. There are a million reasons to stray away from GA that I could think of but one reason keeps me coming back; the only way I can recover from my compulsive gambling addiction is attending meetings. Nothing else has ever worked for me and this is why I come back to the meetings on a regular basis. The program and the wonderful people in the program continue to save my life on a daily basis and I stated this earlier; without GA my life is nothing.

I was so happy to see this person and even though we are no longer “twins” in the GA Program (two people arriving at their first meeting on the same day, time, and place) I have a very special place in my heart for this person. Two years ago we shared our first birthdays together along with two other very special people. Up until yesterday only two of the four us were still active in GA. Hopefully this very special person will again renew their commitment to GA and it was so good to get a hug from a dear friend.

The birthday celebration went very smoothly and was well attended with over 40 people in attendance. This was a great turnout and each of the three celebrants deserved the kind words that were bestowed upon them all through the meeting. It is great to see so many happy people in the room because so often when a member comes to GA for the first time it is not very happy but taking the program one day at a time and applying the principles in our daily life everything does get better and happiness seems to seep through.

The lovely meeting had come to an end and I didn’t rush off to my golf game. I lingered after the meeting talking with friends and catching up with an old dear friend. It does take a great deal of courage to walk back into a GA meeting after going back out even though financial damage may not have been realized. The key ingredient is the emotional damage that had been realized and I know for myself it took so many years to understand that compulsive gambling is an emotional illness not a financial problem. Financial problems are caused and even if the financial problems were resolved the emotional problems will still be there; however; in GA life gets better and there is a program to address those emotional problems.

After chatting for awhile I was off to Palm Springs where I would meet my very good friends. One of these friends I had already seen since I was released as this friend came out in April for a few rounds of golf. The other friend I hadn’t seen in a very long time and I was greeted with a “it is great to have you out”. It is certainly great to be “out” and it is great to have such understanding and accepting friends. We talked for a bit and then we went out and played golf. It was a good round but this time of year in Palm Springs it can be very hot and although the temperature was below normal the 100 degree heat was still very warm. This didn’t matter because we were having a good time, enjoying each other’s company and playing golf.

I played better then Friday but I am still very inconsistent and again this doesn’t matter at all. I relish the good shots and I am grateful I have the opportunity to hit the bad shots. I was with two people who knew me before everything spin out of control in my life and I can still call them friends. These are good friends and I continue to be blessed with an enormous amount of good friends. The golf game was over and thanks to my good friend I had a place to stay for the evening and also thanks to my good friend we had a fabulous dinner. We at a “Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café”, the same Tommy Bahama of the clothing line fame, it was an exceptional dinner. I was very impressed and we had some great conversations. Each one of us has children within basically the same age ranges. I do look to my good friend for guidance on what to expect with my children as his children are a few years ahead of mine and he has a daughter and son who are just about three years apart like my daughter and son.

The conversation moved on to a variety of topics and it was an outstanding evening. We even went to a local bar for a “nightcap”. Since I am continuing my abstinence from alcohol I had club soda all night long. I did want a glass of wine but for some reason I just don’t feel right drinking and I am sure it has to do with the fact I am on parole. I wasn’t doing any driving last night so I had the perfect opportunity yet I decided I wasn’t ready to imbibe in any alcohol at this particular evening. My good friend who had a few glasses of wine did say to me several times; “it is great to have you back,” and I can certainly echo those sentiments.

The fantastic evening had come to a close and it was back to the hotel. I slept very well and was up early this morning for our second round of golf this weekend. Once again the friendship and the golf were exceptional. Everyone seemed to “peter’ out by the last holes due to the heat but it was still a great day by all accounts. The weekend had gone so fast and before I realized it I was driving back to the Sunday evening GA meeting after saying good-bye to my good friends. I am extremely blessed to be able to do the things I have since my release from prison. I continue to enjoy every moment of every day and the moments this weekend were magnificent!!!