Difficulties

I wouldn't be truthful and honest if I didn't say how emotionally draining my situation has become. My situation is nothing like those unfortunate people on the Gulf Coast and in no way should I make a comparison. What they are going through was caused by a natural disaster and their lives have been forever changed. What I did was caused by me and I am getting what I deserve.

I would like the uncertainty to become certainty but this takes time. I don't know if it will be six weeks, six months or six years so all I have is today. Living in limbo is no fun. I am trying to make the best of everything and I am cherishing every moment with my family because I don't know how many more of these moments I have left.

Anyone out there with a gambling problem or think they have a gambling problem please take an honest look at yourself. No one can change you only you can change you. Here is the Gamblers Anonymous link to the 20 questions. Answer these questions honestly and I know this will be difficult because I fooled myself for 20 plus years. If you do answer these questions honestly and realize you are a compulsive gambler get help. Go to a Gamblers Anonymous meeting here is the national schedule of GA meetings if the GA meetings don't seem to work find something else. Here is the link for the internet group I belong to which helps compulsive gamblers recover. Please find something before it gets totally out of control.

Life is so much better without gambling and without deceit. Honesty is certainly the best policy but the honesty has to start with yourself. I should know because I was NOT honest with myself for such a long period of time. Yes, compulsive gambling is a disease of the mind. This does not mean you cannot have a normal productive life. I need my medication (which is not prescription medication it is Gamblers Anonymous, writing this blog, my family and a number of other things and most importantly HONESTY) to continue on the road to recovery. Yes, the road is rocky and it is not easy to navigate; however; given the right map and proper directions the journey will be filled with limitless possibilities.