Silver Bullet

I forgot to mention about the other day when I arrived back at the dorm after yard had been recalled, I walked in and heard some very loud angry voices emanating from near the bathroom area and thought this was very unusual. Over the past 3 months everyone in the dorm has gotten along quite well and I had not noticed any tension whatsoever. Well two of my dorm mates were having a rather animated discussion. I kept my distance, as did the rest of the inmates. However, it was impossible not to hear what was going on. Amazingly this discussion did not escalate into violence which made me very happy. These were two dorm mates of the same race as me which made the situation better. As is the case with just about every argument it was over something very stupid. I will try to be brief. There was an open bunk because one of the dorm mates had moved to another dorm the night before. The CO’s do their best to maintain the racial balance of each dorm and when “A” race moves out, it is replaced by “A” race. It is a “like for like” transaction. Also, the CO’s do allow transfers between the dorms per request. This means if a Bunkie moves out I can approach the CO and request to have someone I know move into that bunk as long as the race is the same. The argument was over how an inmate got transferred to the open bunk who is a friend of another dorm mate. The Bunkie to where this inmate moved in took exception because he was not informed. Apparently, no one was at fault because this inmate has been waiting to come into our dorm for quite awhile because the request was put in a month ago. Thankfully, no fists were thrown and all was great an hour later and the dorm mates made up. Tempers are bound to flare when 36 men live in a 500 square foot area day in and day out.

Yesterday all of the instructors with the exception of one did the entire PFT class to basically show off for the person from CDF who is responsible for their physical training. One particular instructor has told me several times that I am a role model to him because he always sees me training everyday. I don’t know about the fact of being a role model to anyone other than my children (and I have a long way to go in that department) because I train everyday for the simple fact that I really enjoy exercising. I thanked the instructor and did play down the role model comment. It is good to be noticed but that is not the reason why I do what I do each and everyday. I do my best to make each day count instead of simply counting the days. This would make my time go so much slower and I could not feel good about myself. I have heard a few comments similar to this one from other inmates and hopefully I am making a difference by doing what comes naturally for me. Each day I exercise and lately this exercise has gone up a notch. I try and maintain a positive attitude at all times and apparently I am being noticed by others. I am not an inspiration as I was told the other day; I am merely doing my best in this current situation. I do believe there is a reason why I was sent on this journey away from my family and it has most certainly saved my life. Not only has it saved my life, it has enhanced it immensely. I am experiencing something most people (thank God!) will never experience and it has given me a new outlook on life and I know my life is truly incredible.

When I took this class 3 months ago, I had to stop halfway through the second rotation and now nearly 3 months later this same class does not phase me in the least. Unfortunately, my career as a PFT instructor will be short lived as it will conclude at the end of the next PFT class in 2 weeks – assuming I am in the class as a student/instructor.

The coach and the representative from CDF did not say one word to any of the instructors as the class ended. This was very disappointing because I was hoping for some type of feedback at the conclusion of the class but there was none. We did have a meeting with the coach regarding the person from CDF. It appears some changes are coming probably a few months down the road. The representative was impressed with our program and he will push for having an instructor at each Fire Camp. Also, there is an additional test that this person wants the instructors to administer here which is a PAK test. This is required for all civilian wildfire firefighters. A 45 pound pack is strapped on to an individual and he must be able to walk 3 miles in 45 minutes. Once they do this they pass the test. The instructors would be responsible for this and would be certified which is a great fire camp resume builder. There are opportunities within the CDF and their contract agencies which is good to hear. The coach also told us that there are 420 spots open at fire camp in the coming months, and many of the inmates will be sent quickly. Finally, I asked the coach if there is anyway I can come back to being an instructor when I finish fire fighter training. He very nicely explained that it all depends on timing and he didn’t expect me to wait 3 months for fire camp and hopefully I will not.

After the afternoon session of the PFT Plus class I went directly to the “pill call line” and much to my surprise there was one person in line who was walking away from the window as I came up. I went directly to the window without any wait. This is a truly amazing fact! As I was drinking the two protein drinks I saw the CO approaching my dorm for the 1:45 pm unlock. The only problem was my dorm is located across the yard. I gulped the two drinks and then ran full speed to the basketball court to pick up my bag. Then I sprinted to the dorm and I reached the door as the CO was unlocking it which meant my timing was perfect FOR A CHANGE! In fact, it normally takes me 30 minutes to get through the pill call line which screws up my timing for the dorm unlock but not yesterday. All of the stars lined up perfectly and my transition was seamless. This does not happen often, come to think of it, this has NEVER happened so it was great that everything worked out so well. I am not sure if this makes sense to anyone other than me but I have become used to waiting and things not working out so it is special when something so mundane like this comes together. Once again the little things in life mean a great deal in my life.

Last night I started BLINDED by Stephen White. This is the same author who wrote COLD CASE and it includes the same main character. I wasn’t impressed with COLD CASE because it was too detailed for my taste. However, BLINDED is not nearly as detailed and a much easier read. I read the first 100 pages and do wonder where it is all headed but so far so good.

I had grits for breakfast but I believe there could be butter or something like butter in the grits because they didn’t taste too good. I did fill myself up which is my main concern. I was looking forward to doing a long run during the morning yard since it has been awhile that I performed one. However, the yard unlock came 45 minutes late and instead of doing 16 miles I set my sights on doing 13 instead.

As soon as the door opened, I went directly to the track because I didn’t have much time to run before the morning yard closed. I was having a very good run covering each mile in a 7 minute and 38 second pace. However, when I got to mile 8, my stomach didn’t feel so well and I immediately thought about the margarine laced grits and the apple I had for breakfast. I did all I could but (now I don’t mean to be gross and I will try not to be, so please bear with me or skip ahead. Thanks) I really had to go to the bathroom. Now there are two toilets out in the yard but they are stainless steel and provide no privacy. I have vowed never to use these “Silver Bullets” as they are aptly nicknamed – other than number 1. But as I finished mile 10, I was headed to the “Silver Bullet” because the alternative was far worse. Well, I guess God was looking down upon me because the CO was headed toward my dorm for an unscheduled unlock. When I saw this, I altered my path from the “Silver Bullet” to the door. Once again, my timing was impeccable and much to my surprise the toilet in the dorm was unoccupied. I barely and I do mean BARELY made it and haven’t felt that “relieved” in a long time! I did learn a valuable lesson this morning which was to lay off the grits and apple prior to any long distance running. All I can say is WHEW!