Stories

The stories are different but the reason is the same. Whether the person was at the racetrack, on the internet, casino, bingo hall, or convenience store they were still gambling compulsively. MSN.com reported that there are over 20 million pathological (compulsive) gamblers in the United States. (Please click on Stories above for the full article.) The one connection all of these people have is the inability to stop gambling. In my short time in recovery I have heard many many stories. Gladys Knight and Cecil Fielder (ex Detroit Tiger) lost millions of dollars gambling. Each day a new story is heard throughout the country about the wife, father, grandmother, son, daughter, grandfather, etc., who had lost everything to gambling. I am no different. We all like to think we are different but the truth of the matter is gambling controlled each one of us.

I repeated the same behavior pattern for seven consecutive years and I didn't realize what consequences would arise. I started betting on sports at an early age and enjoyed even though I had limited success. Seven years ago I started on a road that would bring me to where I am right now. I started sports gambling earnestly 7 years ago to fill a void at work (I was bored) and it went from filling a void to pitiful incomprehensible demoralization. I couldn't stop or rather I didn't want to stop until all the damage had been done, I am what is labeled as a self destructive gambler. I am not sure what would have happened if I didn't get caught, I am not sure when I would have stopped. This is very hard to believe because any reasonably sane person would have pulled the plug long ago. However; when you (I) perform a behavior for such a long period of time you (I) think this is an acceptable behavior. I think psychologist have a name for it but I can't seem to find; let's call it Rational Thinking of an Irrational Person.

I have attended many GA meetings in the past 65 days and the newer members come in the room speaking about withdrawals and needing their fix almost like a drug addict. We compulsive gamblers do not ingest anything into our bodies but our brain has a chemical reaction to the highs and lows of the particular gamble. When a compulsive gambler has this chemical reaction on a daily basis the brain craves the chemical and the only way to satisfy the brain is to gamble more. I had this craving for 7 years and 65 days ago it all came crashing down. I think my self destruction help get this craving out of my brain for now but when all of my current problems are solved I better still be in GA or else I will start the same self destructive pattern again.

On a sad note; a very good friend of our family has lost their son. It is unnatural to have a parent lose their child at any age. Chris was 33 years old and had a very promising wrestling career. He was undergoing "routine" foot surgery and somehow develop a blood clot and died. You can read more about Chris at http://www.thnt.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2005505010441 Our thoughts and prayers are with Chris' family.