"Get out of Something" Quite the Contrary

I am doing my very best to make each and everyday count in a positive sense. I continue to attend my (aren’t I possessive) GA meetings four times a week and this week I added another just for good measure. I realize there have been some people in the past who thought my motivation for attending the GA meetings was something less then honorable as they thought I was trying to “get out of something”. Well if I was trying (which I am not) to “get out of something” it certainly has not worked. The “get out of something” for me is my compulsive gambling addiction. I knew I needed a very long time ago but when everything came crashing down this is when I finally accepted the fact that I am a compulsive gambler and my life had become completely unmanageable.

In over three years and through some very trying circumstances my life is no longer unmanageable because I have stopped gambling. Not only have I stopped gambling but my life continues to get better all thanks to recovery through the Gamblers Anonymous Program. I have been abstinent from gambling in the past and those stretches lasted a few years. I am trying to remember if I have gone more then 3 years without placing a single bet and I don’t believe I have so this is an accomplishment of sorts. I am downplaying this because through the GA Program I know my compulsive gambling is only “arrested” and if unleashed my life is gone for good. I need to continue to arrest my gambling addiction which is accomplished through the Gamblers Anonymous program one day at a time for a lifetime.

I woke up at the usual early hour but today being a Saturday I gave myself an hour extra of sleep. This week I have implemented a different exercise schedule but it was very much like the workout schedule of two weeks. Since I have a very long run planned tomorrow (22 miles) I wouldn’t be doing any aerobic activity today but I did go to the gym to exercise with weights. This allowed me to sleep-in an hour extra which I felt like I needed. This running regimen is remarkable because prior to Friday’s run I was feeling the effects from the hard run on Thursday but after the run on Friday my legs felt so much better. There is something to be said for getting the lactic acid out of my legs which running two consecutive days allows me. I understand the “method to the madness” and I am enjoying this running schedule.

I am also enjoying my workouts and ever since I learned so many different core (abdomen) exercises while I was “inside” I have carried these out with me to the gym. I am able to use an exercise/stability ball to do many of these exercises which I was unable to do while I served my time. The exercise/stability ball adds another dimension to the workout and it is certainly challenging. I do miss my workout partner/old roommate because he would always set me straight when doing these exercises. Now there is no one to inform me that I am “cheating” on the exercises and I am sure I do take shortcuts every now and then but I always have my old roommate in the back of my mind when I am doing these exercises.

I did the core exercises and I also worked out with weights. Contrary to popular belief I continue to workout with weights five days a week along with running five days a week. I have decided to split the workouts on the weekend since I do need a day of non-aerobic activity prior to a long run and I don’t want to workout with weights on the day I have the long run so this works very well. Today I wasn’t a sweaty mess after my workout and I felt like something was missing but his was okay. In the past I would have done some type of aerobic activity so I could turn into a sweaty mess; however; today there was no need because tomorrow will be a very sweaty mess through and through.

The exercise routine was over and it was on to the Saturday morning GA meeting. The meeting this morning was small in attendees but long on therapy. There were two exceptional members who were in attendance this morning. These two were visiting the meeting but they come so often they are regulars. Both of these members give powerful therapy an invariably their therapies always ring a chord with me. One of these members is moving out of the area very soon and I will miss this member. The two of us share a common bond other then being compulsive gamblers. I met this member early on when I joined GA and I have gained so much experience, strength, and hope from this person. I do wish them well because their life is most certainly working out for the best.

Even though our numbers of attendees were down the meeting still lasted the full two hours and I do believe we have a very special group of wonderful people who attend all of these meetings. The caring is so true and the love so powerful. I am grateful to be a part of such an incredible fellowship. I am so happy I chose to enter that room over three years ago because my life also continues to improve each and everyday.

The meeting was over so I headed into the office. I didn’t want to sit in the office on such a beautiful day so I searched for an inexpensive golf round. I have become so fortunate in finding these very good deals for inexpensive golf. Yesterday I found a rate which was almost 60% less then the normal rate on a very good golf course. I must report that a few years ago I paid nothing for golf when I worked for my previous employer. One of my co-workers had special “deals” with the neighboring golf courses and I seem to always be with this co-worker when they played golf. Now I have to pay for golf and some of the green fees are out of this world. My budget is limited but thanks to the power of the internet I am able to stay within my budget. This was the case today as I discovered another rate which was close to 70% less then the regular rate. I couldn’t pass this up and it was a golf course I haven’t played.

I stayed at the office for an hour but happily drove off to the golf course. I arrived at the golf course only to be told that they had no record of my tee time and paid green fees. In recovery I have found that lashing out doesn’t work very well so when I am faced with a situation such as this where I want to lash out I remain calm and say, “okay, how do we fix this?” The gentleman at the golf course was very nice and contacted the website I booked the reservation on. He informed them that they made a mistake and must refund my money. He not only got them to refund me money but he re-booked my tee time for 30 minutes later at an even reduced rate from the reduced rate!! I didn’t mind waiting the extra 30 minutes because I continued to save money. I don’t see the need to scream and yell when things don’t go my way. I trust and believe everything will work out for the best and everything did workout for the best today.

I did get out playing golf for the second day in a row but today I was by myself. I was teamed up with two very nice gentlemen one of which was visiting from a distance country. Normally these golfers get a bad rap but I found playing with them very enjoyable and it helps add to my patience level. I played as well as yesterday even though I shot one stroke worse then yesterday. I did lose a ball but one ball in 36 holes is pretty good for me. The day was beautiful with bright sunshine and blue skies. I truly was one with the golf course and my game is improving much faster then I thought. Yes, I am making the very best of each day and loving every moment.