Michael Burke Compulsive Gambler

There is a “stat counter” attached to this page which records how many hits this blog receives on a daily basis. Not only does it count the hits on the page it also records where the hit came from and if it was a direct entry or if it came from a search engine and what that particular search may have been. I receive most of the hits from direct entry which are most likely limited to my dear family members and friends. I do however; get the off the beaten search for items such as “compulsive gambling,” “I am married to a compulsive gambler,” “what the bleep do we know?” and other items. Today I received a search for “Michael Burke compulsive gambling”. I guess I have typed quite a bit of words in the past three years and this blog does pop-up on many often unrelated Google searches.

I was curious as to whom “Michael Burke compulsive gambler” might be so I clicked on the search string. I came across this site and found a very similar story to mine. Mr. Burke has taken it the next level in writing a book which is due out in a few days. What I found remarkable that the book has been published by the American Bar Association the same association he was associated with as he served as an attorney in the state of Michigan. Mr. Burke was disbarred due to his crimes committed to support his compulsive gambling addiction but it appears through recovery his life continues to get better each day. I did not notice a mention of his recovery through Gamblers Anonymous but he did mention Alcoholics Anonymous.

This person “cross-addicted” from alcoholic to compulsive gambler even though he was an active member of AA; this brings me to an observation about 12 step programs. Often I have heard how other people who are involved with different 12 step programs end up being a compulsive gambler. This is the lure of the compulsive gambling addiction; that one big win to solve all of our problems. This is a huge myth and as I stated last night during the Gamblers Anonymous meeting there isn’t a win big enough to solve “all” of my problems. If for someone reason I continued to gamble and had that big win I know it is just superfluous to everything. Compulsive gambling is an emotional illness not a financial problem. The financial problems are caused by the emotional illness not vice versa.

This brings me to another point which is how can a person who truly works their 12-step program cross addict into another addiction? The power of the 12-steps provides a positive way of life in every aspect so how can a person “hurt” themselves by going to gamble or the gambler going to drink or doing drugs or even any other addiction. I don’t know the answer to this and I have often heard “I was really working my fill-in the blank 12-step program but I couldn’t stop gambling.” Maybe it is that big myth of having the one big win to solve all of our problems but I do believe as long as I embrace the 12 steps of recovery and unity and work the Gamblers Anonymous Program to the best of my ability my life continues to get better with each passing day and there is no doubt this has been the case over the past three years.

Mr. Burke also spent time in prison and much more time then me. It does appear he has found some form of recovery and is giving back in everyway possible. My story has never been unique and this is yet another example of where this horrible disease can take a person. There was an interesting passage where Mr. Burke speaks about the first time he “borrowed” his clients funds to gamble and thinking how that was the end of his legal career yet the compulsion to gamble overwhelmed all rational thoughts. I too had a similar thought pattern when I was stealing from my employer. In a brief moment of clarity I tucked my daughter into bed, kissed her goodnight and thought to myself “honey, I love you so much in spite of what I am doing (stealing)”. This moment of clarity was indeed very brief because the very next day I continued the thievery.

The end to my gambling had to happen the way it happened or else I would still be doing it. There were many times I could have just stopped and walked away. This was even a full month where I didn’t “borrow” any money yet after that month the “borrowing” escalated higher then it ever had been before. Compulsive gambling is truly a sickness and thank God I take my vitamins through the Gamblers Anonymous Program to keep this sick at bay. I know this sickness will never go away which is why I want and need the GA Program in my life. I wish Mr. Burke the best in his endeavors and I am fairly certain his life just like mine is so much better without gambling then it was with gambling.

Last night’s GA meeting was excellent and the attendance was back up to the Tuesday evening standards. Someone commented that it was like a “topic” meeting because everyone’s therapy seemed to have the same theme. It is a wonderful place to share whatever is on my mind and this usually centers on how my life continues to improve through the GA Program. Someone also mentioned that a pill should be designed to remove the addiction of compulsive gambling from the brain and this maybe a good idea for some people but to me that is just a short term fix.

The long term fix is about providing a progressive character change. After all compulsive gambling is a progressive disease which never gets better only worse which is why recovery is a progressive process that gets progressively better never worse!!! The choice is clear for me and I choose to progressively get better not worse!!